


Whether We're Together Or Apart

by Betterthanmodest



Category: Disney Princesses, Gender/Sexbent Disney - Ripushko, One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Cinderella, Cinderella Elements, Genderbend, Louis comes in after the first few chapters, M/M, Male Cinderella, Male Homosexuality, first fic, like cinderella but she is a male
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-31
Updated: 2016-02-15
Packaged: 2018-02-05 14:05:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 29,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1821073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Betterthanmodest/pseuds/Betterthanmodest
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry is a prince with a loving mom and dad. Then something horrible happens to Harry's Father. Then his Mother decides to remarry. Harry despises his stepfather and his stepfather despises Harry. His (nice) stepsister is there to help him. Then something magical happens. Harry has an arranged marriage and he shall be the new king. While meeting the other princess's family, Harry might of, sort of, accidentally fell in love with her brother Louis</p><p>or</p><p>The modern version of a genderbent cinderella, but he falls in love with a prince instead of a princess</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Life as he knows it

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first try at fan fiction. If you could help improve the writing errors and such, it would be great. It's Cinderella inspired. Except Cinderella is a male. And there's no secret identity, ball, fairy god mother, and evil stepsister.

There was a prince named Harry. He had a mother and a father. The kingdom was mostly ran by the king but his wife would come in between tough choices. Basically, she was the tie breaker between the government and her husband’s choices.

His Mother, Anne, would always encourage what Harry would do. Which helped him learn everything he could. Anything he wanted, his mother did her best to give him just that. Harry wanted to learn piano? She got him a personal teacher. He wanted to learn how to write? Mother got Harry to write at a professional level at age eight. Harry loved Anne for doing this, and thanks her for his extensive knowledge of about everything.

One time, Harry took interest in dance. He saw how it helps build your body and how it can add to one of his many skills. So Anne signed him up for dance. She was excited he liked the arts.

“What kind of dance do you want to learn? Do you want to do jazz? Lyrical? Ballet? There’s a lot to chose from you know”

Harry chose Ballet and lyrical, knowing that would really build muscle and flexibility from it. A week later was the first class. When Anne and Harry arrived, both of them noticed that there was hardly any other boys, in fact no other boys were in his class. All there were was girls. Most of them brought a tutu and a crown. Harry thought it was weird that there was a lot of other princesses. Then he realized that the crowns are plastic and that they have no power. Harry observed everyone in the class. Most of the girls were peeking at each other like it was a guessing game of “Who will be the best”. The teacher was, once again, female. She looked surprised and happy that there was at least one male in her class. Harry then looked at the mothers. The Mothers would snicker at Harry, giving him dirty looks.

“Wow. Didn’t think children found out they’re gay at such a young age” One mother said, disgusted towards Harry.

To cut through the BS, Anne immediately beat the woman until she begged mercy and apologized. Thank god the other moms didn’t know she was the queen, for that would’ve caused a lot of drama in the kingdom. Harry continued going to the classes but every time he went to practice, all the mothers were afraid. Harry knew why. Harry thought of them were like a herd of sheep. When one mother makes it okay to make fun of a young boy for choosing to dance, all the other moms followed. But when one mom is beaten and showed that it’s not okay, the other moms obey and follow. Harry took advantage of this and walked through the class with his head up high. "This is what being king must feel like" Harry thought. The other girls took him under their wing. They didn’t see anything wrong with him dancing. Sure, ballet is typically a girly type of dance, but he was way more flexible than the other girls. They all bowed down to him. It was a great class. Too bad Harry didn’t really enjoy dance after all, so he quit.

~*~

Harry really never had friends. There was the neighborhood children, but they didn't come over or ever want to spend time with him. ~~He was to be taught about how the kingdom and government works instead of attending public school.~~ Harry was home schooled. He never had a problem with it. As long as he did also learned what regular students were learning too. Harry would sometimes think about not having a childhood and how sad that is. Then he’ll look out the window of his room and see the neighborhood kids beating each other.  Honestly, Harry knew he wasn't supposed to live like other kids. For god’s sake, he’s _The prince_. The future king. He wouldn't have a regular adult life either. He would have to learn about the kingdom and how to keep it non-corrupt for when he was king.

Father was the same as Mother. Supportive. Any questions Harry had, he would ask his father. Father always gave great advice. When he was not dealing with the kingdom, Father (Des) would spend all his time with his family. Mostly Harry. You know, Father/Son bonding time. Harry was a curious kid and Des was a wise man. All the questions of a kid were answered correctly. All of them.

“Dad?” Harry asked with his hands interlocked in front of him.

“Yes, Harry?” Des said sweetly.

“How are babies made?” Harry said with a straight face.

Des furrowed his eyebrows. Harry was 9 at the time. Should he tell Harry the truth or change the subject?

Harry waited for an answer. Des took a sigh. He would tell the truth. Des took Harry and put him on his lap. He looked down to Harry.

“A girl and boy must have intercourse. If they’re lucky a zygote, egg and sperm combined, would be formed. Then later on, the baby might continue growing along the uterus of the mother. Then it’s a fetus, with a heartbeat and organs. Then when nine months pass by, the mother must give birth to it. A doctor would be there to help guide it out of the mother. Then they see what gender it is. They name it and take care of the child until they are ready to go out on it's own.”

Harry had a frozen expression. Father cringed. He should've told the stork story. Harry might be a bright kid but telling him the truth maybe wasn’t a great idea. Des always despised how parents lied to their children. Supporting the “Santa Claus” mumbo jumbo , and all the other fairy tales children are told but are meant to learn the truth when they grew up, would just continue on the “tradition” and let companies make a cheap dollar out of everyone. Father was surprised when Harry embraced him.

“Thank you” Harry said with his face buried in his father’s sweater.

Des released the breath he was holding. Harry did understand after all and luckily wasn't scared.Harry ran down the way-to-long stairs to tell Anne.

“Hey mom! Guess what? I know how babies are made” Harry exclaimed to his mother

Anne loved the smile on Harry's face, “That’s great! Tell me again, how are they made?”

Let’s just say Anne's smile faded and did not expect the answer she was given.

~*~

Anne stormed upstairs. Her heels hitting the hard wood stairs so loud it echoed around the castle.  
“Honey? Guess what Harry just told me?” Anne said with a obvious forced smiled hiding her pissed expression.

Anne usually was calm and nurturing, but when she’s pissed, expect the worst. Des gulped. He knew what his wife was bickering about.

“Is it about science life?” Des said, chuckling a bit. Sarcasm was the only way he can hid him being afraid.

“Yes, it is” Mother said with her teeth clenching “Harry knows how babies are made”

“Well, isn't that great” Father said sarcastically

Mother went on full on rage, “WHY ** _IN THE HELL_** DOES OUR SON KNOW ABOUT SEX AND THE PROCESS OF CHILDREN?! HE'S ONLY BLOODY NINE!”

“Well, honey”, Des said knowing it will piss his wife off even more, “You know I don’t like phony stories. Our son deserves to know the exact truth.”

Anne unclutched her fists. She rubbed her temples repeating "stay calm" to herself. She sat down on Their bed. Des rubbed her back soothingly, like it was a apology about getting her mad.

“Sorry I raised my voice. I should’ve known you would do this.", she said turning to Des, "I’m over reacting. Harry seems fine knowing the truth.”

Des grabbed Anne in his arms. She laid her head against his.

“You did over react a little” Des said holding up his fingers showing a little amount. Anne lightly punched Des in his shoulder.

That was the great thing about Harry’s parents. They understood each other and did what was best for him. 

~*~

Harry would get bored of his castle. He spent most of his time on the internet. It was fun going on omegle and putting in "Prince Harry" for the interests. Girls would go on and on fantasying about marrying him and becoming the next queen. After about ten minutes, Harry put his webcam on and revealed they were talking about him all along. Then they either a)logged out immediately  ~~ _and harry laughing so hard he was about to cry_~~ _,_ b)squeal so loud it defend him, or c) laugh or chuckle with harry. Sometimes he would jokingly say "Will you marry me?". _  
_

When he got older, Harry would sneak out of the castle. Which was a challenge itself because he was the second highest window from the ground. After many attempts of failing, he figured out how he can climb down the side of the castle. He would put his left foot on the stone sticking out of the castle. Then he put his right foot on the ledge. Once he gained balance he would do a swift motion of putting his left foot on the ledge and release his hands from his window sill. Four minutes later of side shuffling, he would reach his parent's balcony. Depending on his timing he would wait for them to leave the room or they weren't there. He climbed over the railing, walked across, then jumped over the railing still holding on to it. Then he would put his feet on the nearest tree branch. Then the rest was a piece of cake. He would fling his long limbs over the branches, pull himself down, and reached the space where all the branches connected. Harry would sit down, close his eyes and feel the wind flowing through his hair. Harry didn't get enough excuses to leave so he always appreciated the weather when he did.

Sometimes he wouldn't even feel like going out. He would spread his legs and put his arms behind his head. They house servants would go looking for him and he would jump down and go into the back yard. "There you are" They would say. The tree hangout was his secret and didn't want them to find out about it. If they did, how would he sneak out?

When he did go out into the town, he would go into the outlets. The walk there would be about 10 minutes. The entrance would have the occasional street performer. Harry would stay and listen to their songs. They always would get so into it. You could see their bearing souls pouring out from their fingertips strumming guitar and their lyrics. It was their passion that always got Harry. He would leave a 20 dollar tip. The performers would look so grateful, "Thank you, bless you". "Not a problem" Harry would say. Then he would run away before they realized they were talking to the prince.

 


	2. Birthday Boy (part 1)

Harry woke up with drool on his chin. Nothing new, really. There was the small window across the room, his dreary blinds that would stop his subjects from seeing what he does. Harry just lies on his bed with his phone but hey, they don’t need to know that. He checked his website on his phone. It’s a website where he can talk to his subjects and show their lives. It’s like a dictator-ish instagram. Everyone sees what he posts but he can only see posts of the people he follows. But anyone can talk to him. Harry got off his bed and put his socked feet on the hardwood floor. He walks into his bathroom and looks at the mirror. His bedhead was out of control. His Brown curls was sticking to the right, though his bangs was glued to his forehead. Harry splashes his face with cold water, then takes a shower.

~*~

Downstairs is his Mother, Anne, making breakfast. A three tier cake. Anne stacks the cakes as a house servant walks into the kitchen.

“Morning, My highness.”

“Good morning, Norma.”

Norma looks at what the queen was doing. Then she frowns. “Oh, you don’t have to do that. I could've easily done this for you” Norma then grabs the Anne’s hand. “It’s my job anyways. Go get ready before the prince comes down stairs.”

Anne rips her hand out of Norma’s. “It’s my son’s birthday. I always made him this for his birthdays. _I_  made them.” Anne pointed at herself.

She was obviously pissed of. Norma looked scared. She didn’t know what to do. Anne’s expression softened.

“I’m terribly sorry”, Anne said as soft as a whisper, having her head kept down, “you can have the day off. It  _is_  Harry’s birthday”. Norma took a good look at the Queen. Her hands were shaking, she was on the verge of tears, and her grey hairs weren't dyed. Which was weird because she never left her room without fixing them. Norma sat Anne down and sat beside her.

“Oh love, what’s wrong?”

Anne shot her head up in shock. “How did you?- Nothing’s wrong” Anne lied.

Norma shot her a _oh don’t bullshit me_  look. “I’ve known you since you became queen. You don’t ever act like this.” Norma pushed her a bit with her shoulder. “Tell me.”

~*~

Harry towel dried his hair. He put cologne behind his ear and on his wrists. Like Father showed him. He then put on a denim button up shirt and his black skinny jeans and his boots. He looked at himself in the mirror. _Damn I’m getting old_   He thought. Harry noticed his baby fat was disappearing and his cheekbones were showing. He kinda hated that. Only because his stomach fat was disappearing, while his baby face wasn't. And a little bit because he can’t diss older woman who were hitting on him. He used the  _sorry but im not legal_  yet excuse. Harry then went downstairs. It smelled familiar.

“Birthday cake.” He said to himself smiling.

Mum, Dad, and Norma was behind the legendary three tier cake.

“Happy Birthday.” They all cheered.

“Good morning, would’ve sufficed.” Harry said smirking.

Norma swatted his arm playfully.“Spoiled wanker”.

Father got out the plates, while Anne fetched the milk. Norma started cutting the cake. After they got settles they sat and ate together.

“Mmm, Mum, best cake yet” Harry said rubbing his stomach before chugging his milk.

“Thank you baby, though I didn’t do anything new to it” Mother said raising a eyebrow.

“How does it feel one step closer to death?” His Father,Des, said randomly.

Anne was the one to swat him.

“Actually, good. Thanks for asking” Harry said.

He then put his dishes away. Des quickly got up, knocking Norma’s milk.

 _"Sorry "_  Des mouthed.

Norma waved her hand, _"My job anyways"_  she mouthed.

“Soooo…..Harry how’s that website going?” Des said awkwardly.

Harry raised an eyebrow to Anne and Norma. They shrugged showing they have no idea either. Harry then looked over his shoulder to his Father.

“It’s going well. I get to know subjects and speak to them. It also shows that I’m not that different from them”.

Des then pulls out his phone. “Have you seen this?”

Harry looked at the screen. It was a page with the title “ **Harry’s sixteenth** ”. Harry raised his eyebrows in surprise. Nothing like this ever happens on his website. He grabs the phone out of Des’s hands. When he scrolls down he sees comments regarding the party.

 **it’s going to be hosted at the center hall, everyone bring something for the birthday boy Xx;)**  (posted by logan michelle 15:23)

 **dress code is semi-formal, Dj is needed and there will be requests. This party is going to be sick!!!**  (posted by Milestone 16:42)

 **Party starts at 8, let Harry find out soon and show him how much we love our prince!! <3**(posted by Daisy Mass 16:56)

 **No parents allowed, this party is ran by teens for teens. Although we do love you king Des xD**  (posted by Phillip Kinney 17:13)

Harry felt his heart rushing. It was either his anxiety or pride. Mostly pride, he chose. His subjects created a party for him. All his life he was ignored or snickered at because people thought he was a brat. He was no different from anyone else (except he _is_  the prince. but he was born into it, he didn’t really have a choice). The party was showing he was different, but in a good way. People wasn’t _forced_  to throw him a party, they _decided_  to. Which made him feel good about being a prince for once.

“Keep scrolling” Des said

Harry scrolled all the way down. It read,  **Page created by Des the King**.

“Des the King?” Harry said not getting what Des was trying to do

“That’s my account” Des said “I started the idea”.

Harry's heart bursts out of love. His eyes started to water. He threw his arms around Des' waist. Des hugged him back. Harry was about to damn cry. This is the best thing that has ever happened. Des rubbed Harry’s back soothingly.

“Thank you so much Dad. This is the sickest thing you could’ve done. Love you” Harry said into his Father’s shoulder.

“No problem, my boy”

Anne got up and rubbed Harry’s eyes away from tears. “Let’s go get you ready, yeah?”

Then the hug broke away and Harry looked at his father. Then at his mum. Then he hugged them both.

~*~

They end up in the outlets. There first stop is at the beauty salon. A bell chimes when they enter and a woman walks up to them.

“Welcome, what can we do for you today?”

The woman had white hair. Like actual white hair. Her hair was teased to the max. One piece of hair was braided and pinned across her head while the rest where in a bun. She walked around in 6 inch heels. How in  _the hell_  can she do that? This woman is either really crazy or ballsy.

“Yes, He has a party to attend to later;semi-formal", Anne said basically doing all the talking, "He let you know what he fancies and for me, please dye my hair” Anne points to her grays, “It’s outrageous”.

“Of course. What about him?” The lady says pointing to Des.

“Oh, I could go for a trim” Des says casually.

“Great, follow me” the lady says.

She guides them down the hall, her heels clicking against the tile floor. There’s three spinney chairs and each of them take a seat.

“Mia and Sally will take care of you two” The lady says to Anne and Des.“ I will take care of you” The lady says facing Harry.

~*~

“Alright so what do I have to work with” The lady says looking at Harry’s hair.

“It’s pretty long, I would like it shorter but not too much. I like my hair long. It shows my curls.” Harry says.

“I’ll cut of an inch then if you like it shorter you tell me, okay love?”

Harry nods, and the lady smiles “Good, I don’t want to be known as the hairdresser who messed the prince’s hair”

Harry laughs, “that wouldn’t be good for business huh? I appreciate it……”

“Louise” The lady says

“Louise” Harry repeats. And smiles.

“How do you feel about quaffs?” Louise ask

“I really like them to be honest”

Louise does a little dance “Yes! Most clients don’t like them for some reason. I think only fine men like them”

“Does that make me a fine man then?” Harry said smirking

“The finest” Louise winks

After spraying his hair with water and combing through it about 58 times, Louise cuts off an inch. Than another. Lou then got a hair dryer and blow dried his hair.She gets a glob of hair mold and rubs it between her hands. Louise runs her fingers through his hair. She then gets a comb and quaffs his hair.Harry's hair is beautifully long enough where his hair stands up high, but not freakishly high.

“How’s that?” Louise asks finally showing Harry himself with a mirror

Harry looked like another person. He looked so mature and  _posh_. His curls were tamed and styled in a way where it shows his natural hair. He never gave himself credit. He had beautiful green eyes, complemented with his dark brown hair. It was beautifully contrasted by his light skin. Harry put the mirror to the table next to him. He stood up and hugged Louise.

“It’s perfect” Harry said choked up.

Louise laughs “Emotional one huh?”

Harry shrugs. He has been called that enough where if he had a dollar every time someone said that he could buy a new outfit. Harry released Lou and put a hand on her shoulder.

“By the way Louise, how _the hell_  do you walk in those heels?”.

“It’s quite easy after a while”.

“I reckon it 6 inches right?”

“5” Louise states.

They smile at each other. Harry is going to keep Louise close

~*~

They all walk out different. Except Des. He stood to his plans. Anne ended up dying her hair Lilac. She and Harry _loved_   it. Des still has to double take whenever he looks at Anne.

“ I can already see the headlines” Des began “Breaking news:..” Des puts his hands out in front of himself “The Queen has purple hair. Everyone must dye their hair purple”

“Lilac” Anne corrected Des

Des shoots his hands up. “I stand corrected”

Harry runs to his favorite restaurant holding open the doors

“Hungry?”

“Starving” Anne and Des simotimously said entering the restaurant.

~*~

It's a nice little restaurant. With wicker seats and tables. And the smell coming from the kitchen gives it a home-y feel. It was the restaurant that harry met his first friend. Harry didn't go to a public school so he didn't get to make friends easily. It was a rainy day when Harry sneaked out of the castle and his friend just came back from detention. His name was something like Niall. Harry was reading a book when he heard a  _thump_. He dumped his backpack on harry's table. Niall was so tired he didn't notice harry.

"Ummm" Harry said behind Niall's enormous backpack

 Niall turned around, "Oof! Sorry, didn't see ya there", he slid his backpack to another seat. Niall's face then widend. "Hey, you're the prince"

Harry then kinda freaked out, he sneaked out of the castle so he can get fresh air and see around town. He didn't want people to know he was out. "Oooh, well.....yes. I am"

Niall then laughed really loud. His blonde hair flopped on his face. "It's cool. Nice to meet ya, mate". He put his hand out, "Niall"

Harry sat there frozen. He looked at Niall's hand. He shook it, "Harry. O-Obviously". Niall laughed again.

They sat together. Niall explained detention to Harry. Harry told him how his life is as a prince. It was a nice interaction. Harry wondered what happened to Niall.

~*~

“THE ROYAL FAMILY, HOLY SHI-” The waitress squeals.

The whole restaurant turns around by the commotion. 

"Sorry everyone!" The waitress loudly says to the whole restaurant, "Everything's okay".

She then turns to Harry and his family,”Sorry, its just. It isn’t everyday you see the royal family.” She says calmly

Des nods politely. Anne and Harry chuckle.

“Oh-well my n-name is Noelle, i’ll be your waiter today. What would you like?”

Anne speaks for all of them, “I’ll get the Cesar salad, the king would like a ham sandwich with extra mayo and the prince would get Alfredo pasta with chicken”

Noelle writes it down, "And for drinks?"

"Three waters please" 

She goes into the kitchen.

You would think that being part of a royal family Harry would be used to being recognized. But he sometimes forget he's a prince so whenever people freak out like that, Harry feels weird. He is just a person like them. But this happens _all. The. Time._  

She returns with their drinks and food later. Then Noelle puts down a piece of chocolate cake next to Harry. Harry looks at the cake. He didn't order cake. Harry then raises his hands. Noelle comes back.

“Sorry to wastes your time, but you left a cake here, we didn’t order cake”

Noelle smiles and looks to the ground. “It’s no mistake”

Harry is confused. He opens his mouth to speak but Noelle beats him to the punch.

“It’s on the house” Noelle winks at Harry “No problem for the birthday boy”. She walks away, her blonde hair swaying side to side.

“Get in” Des says when she is out of hearing range.

Anne swats him. “Inappropriate” she mouths.

 Harry leans against his chair. Did someone just flirt with him? When did this become a thing?

Anne starts eating her salad, “She was pretty”.

Harry looks at her and she looks at him.

“Noelle” Mother states like it was obvious.

Harry nods. Anne put her hands on Harry's.“You okay, love?”

That’s what he was trying to figure out.

“Yeah….just I never got anything free” Harry said awkwardly winging an excuse.

He can see Des rolling his eyes and Anne knowing it’s bullshit. At least she accepts it.

~*~

Mother leaves to go home, something about needing her beauty rest. So it’s only Harry and Des. The last thing to do is to get a suit. They enter the tuxedo shop and walk around. There were suits on display. Each had a number on it. In styles labeled, "Casual", "Formal", and "Semi-formal".

“Do you know your size?” Des asks Harry

“I don’t even remember my shoe size” Harry touches the suits. So many patterns and fabrics.

“Hello, how may I help you?” A male’s voice speaks to them.

They turn around. He is taller than Harry, but not Des. Maybe 5”10. Full beard and wearing a suit. Not surprising.

“My son here is looking for a suit” Des says with his hands on Harry's shoulders

“Yes of course, what style?”

“Semi-formal." Harry interrupts "I don't know my size"

The man furrowed his eyebrows confused. Then his face softens to a smile. “Oh, there is no ‘sizes’. We need to measure you”

Des looked like a weight was lifted off his shoulders. Harry just felt like an idiot.

Again.

“Well then, let’s get started” Harry said enthusiasm returning.

The man gets a measuring tape,”Follow me”.

They go to another room down a hall. The walls are tan colored with wooden furniture and along the walls are item frames of different fabrics.

“Spread your arms out to your sides” The man ordered.

Harry obeyed. He measured the length from his collarbone to his stomach. Then to his hip. the length from his neck to the end of his shoulder. From his shoulder to his elbow. From his elbow to his wrist. This takes about 5 minutes. All in pure silence. Then he writes all the measurements down. Harry stands awkwardly with his arms still up. The man stops writing and looks up to Harry.

“You can put your arms down”.

Harry then put his arms down with a sigh of relief and leans on the wall. The man is still looking at Harry.

“Yes, I’m the prince. I’m also the most boring human being on this planet” Harry says laughing at himself

The man chuckles, “Doubt it”. He moves closer. “But you are absolutely the most attractive”

Harry blushes. Then looks at the ground and smiles.

“Mean it?” Harry says looking up.

The man is literally a step away from Harry “I don’t need to prove that you are..” The man grabs Harry’s hand “..The most beautiful man i’ve seen”. The man then kisses Harry's knuckles.

Harry's face is flush red of embarrassment. He then walk across the room to create space between them. The man's face is now frowning, obvious guilt showing in his face.

“Sorry, I'm really sorry, I stepped the line” The man apologizes.

Harry shakes his head,”No, you didn't it’s just that…” Just what? He was complemented by a man and that's uncomfortable? That he doesn't know how to react? To feel?

The man gestures him to go on

“You should know that i’m not legal….yet. I’m also not….” Harry's breath gets caught in his throat

The man puts a hand up to stop Harry. “I get it. Again, i’m sorry”

Harry nods. They continued on with what they were meant to be doing. It was still awkward when he asked what fabrics Harry wanted. And when he was sewing, and measuring, and cutting, and giving him the finished blazer. It fit Harry like a glove. Then he leaves the room to show Des.

“Perfect” Des says smiling.

“That would be 39.95” Said the man, entering the room.

Des paid the man and they left. When they were out of earshot Harry spoke again.

“We are never going there again”

Des raised an eyebrow in question. Harry looked back despaired. He decided not to bother asking why. 

“Fine with me” said Des

~*~

Along the way home, Harry kept replaying the scenes from earlier today. Noelle  _was_  pretty. The tuxedo man was so forward and you know, was a  _man_. And Harry isn't into men, right? Noelle was small, adorable and cheeky. It was all too sudden to realize what was going on. He would've flirted back if he was in the right mindset. Right? Harry then picked up the Styrofoam box with the cake in it. He opened it. And stared. For what felt like a lifetime. Harry knew he was so out of it today. He felt his father's eyes carefully watching. Harry still didn't know what he felt, or what he was thinking. He was just........... _confused._

"Wanna talk about it?" Des carefully spoke to Harry.

Harry then looked and stared at Des. He noticed he missed a spot when he was shaving this morning. And that his hair was blown over from the wind. Then Harry stared into a daze.

Des gave up waiting for a reply so he looked back out the window. Harry decided to forget about it.

~*~

When they arrived at the castle, Anne was waiting with a birthday present. The large door opened up and they entered. Des and Harry hung their coats. Harry walked into the kitchen. Anne was there with a gift.

"What's in the box, Mum?" Harry asked

"Open it and see" Anne said excitedly extending her arms with the present.

Harry walked up to Anne and took the box. He lifted the lid and removed the tissue paper slowly. When it was off, he spotted a new pair of skinny jeans. Harry looked up to his mum. Anne was smiling with her eyes full of excitement.

"It's the pair you wanted" Anne explained, "And there's more"

Harry took the pants of and under was a new pair of boots

"Are you trying to get rid of my old ones?" Harry said smiling

Anne rolled her eyes, "Oh come on, Harold. Yours are going to fall apart soon"

Harry lifted his leg up and petted one of his boots,"Don't listen to her"

Harry smiled, "Thanks Mum", he brought them into a hug

"Oh no problem, love. Now," Anne said pulling away, holding Harry's hands, "Go get changed before you leave for your bash"

Harry then ran up the too-long stairs, "LOve you!" he hollered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter had to be split in half or else it would be loooooong. So the event that "changed his life" is in the next part.


	3. Birthday Boy (part 2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I recommend listening to "Money Makes Her Smile" by Bruno Mars. It's vital to the chapter so listen if you want.

It’s now 7:38. The limo is a block away from the center hall. Harry can already hear music blasting.

_When the zeros line up on your 24 hour clock, when you know who’s calling even though the number is blocked._

     “You know it’s a damn good party if you hear the music a block away.” The cabbie joked. 

Harry chuckled nodding. When they came closer, he can see a huge crowd. Everyone’s dressed nicely casual. The entrance was decorated with streamers and a huge sign stating “Harry’s sixteenth aka the year he’s legal”. Some people hung around the entrance, smoking. _so it’s going to be that kinda party_  He thought. People turned their heads towards the limo. He can see the girls swooning.

     “Go on then.” The cabbie insisted.

     “Starting to dread this.” Harry says with his leg vibrating.

     “Oh, come on. It’ll be great!”

Harry wishes he can believe him, “How do I look?”

The cabbie smooths his hair up and straightens his blazer. “Now fix your collar and wrist cuffs when you get out. You’ll look great”

Harry pats the cabbie's shoulder and climbs out. The music is so loud it hurts.

_You and me could’ve been a team. each had a half of a king and queen seat. like the beginning of “Mean Streets”, you could be my baby._

He knows he’ll get used to it though. 

He straightens his collar. He can feel the eyes of the smokers watch him. A girl whistled at him. So he _does_ look good. With that he smirks and flips his hair. They all are now murmuring. He buttons his wrist cuffs and walk across the road.

     “Can I get a pic?” A girl asks. She’s wearing a purple mini dress and black wedges. Her hair is curled and pinned to the side

     “Of course babe.” Harry says. They pose and she gets a picture.

     “Happy Birthday!” She giggles

He continues to walk. The stone path way lined with bushes breaks into three sections. A garden, the back of the center hall, and a separate park. Right smack in the middle is a fountain. A group of guys snicker when he passes them. “Party’s lame, don’t go in”

Harry turns to them, “Really?”

     “Yeah, just like the prince.” He high fives the rest of his friends

Harry burrows his eyebrows, “Was that supposed to be offending?”

The guy then turns silent, “Uh….yeah”

Harry tries his best to hide his laughter. This guy’s wearing a fucking snapback and a windbreaker to a semi-formal party. Yeah, _Harry_ is the lame one here. “I didn’t plan the party, citizens did. Which is bloody amazing alone. And you guys are wearing snapbacks to a semi formal party. Please recheck who is the lame one.” He smiles then walk away. He can hear them getting offended and calling him a bitch. He hasn’t even entered the party and it seems like a bust. Then a woman tackles him.

     “Oh my god, Harry Styles. _The_ harry styles! Remember me?”

She had short red hair and was wearing pumps,black leggings, white button up and a tie. Nope, didn’t ring a bell. “Sorry love, but I don’t.” Harry shrugs innocently.

Her face fell, “It’s Rebecca. We met on omegle. You said 'will you marry me?' You planned on seeing me but you couldn’t because of your parents.”

Harry then remembers. He was bored on omegle and they met. Harry thought it was a great idea to actually see her but his parents were totally against it. _You can’t meet people you found on the internet, they could be lying. What are you planning to do with her? Are you trying to date at 10 years old?_ It’s one of those cringing memories he just forgot. “Oh, yeah. How are you?”

Harry ended up meeting people from his horrible childhood all the way to center hall. He regrets coming in the first place

~*~

Harry finally entered the center hall building. He ducked, covering his face, because he didn’t want to cause any disturbance of the party. Or let anyone from his past to know he arrived. He likes the first excuse better. It smelled of perfume, alcohol, and cigarettes. In the center was a grand dance floor with smoke machines and rays of colored light. Then a table with snacks and a bowl of Hawaiian punch off to the side. Someone had to spike it because everyone seemed at least tipsy. Harry leaned against the wall next to the entrance and watched the others. People were buzzed off drunk. Sloppily dancing, stomping their feet to the ground, making sure they don’t fall. He heard his name from time to time. “Have you seen Harry yet?”. “Do you think Harry got busy he couldn’t arrive?” “I was looking forward to seeing Harry”. In front of the dance floor was a DJ booth. Behind him was a screen with the lyrics currently playing.

_All the zeros lined up. But the number’s blocked. When you’ve come undone_

They did have a great selection of music. A+ to the person who booked him. A++ to the DJ himself. Couples were snogging against the walls. Some of them looked really into it. _“Get a room, god!”_ Harry heard a girl exclaim. He noticed to the right side of the building were stairs that lead to a second story. A sign read “No one likes PDA at parties. Especially at Prince Harry’s party. Above are rooms for you love birds to borrow”. Whoever thought of that Harry gives kudos to them.

The song ended and people cheered. Some clapped their hands, some blew kisses to the DJ.

     “That’s all I can do tonight, who ever feels like singing tonight feel free to do so” The DJ said into the mic. His fringe was swirled with a strand of blonde hair. The sides of his hair buzzed off. Black jeans and a shirt that said _‘Bam’_ like a comic strip.

Sound surrounded the room. Harry turned his head around. Speakers lined the edge of the roof. He didn’t know that was a thing. But it was damn cool. A brave soul (drunk off her ass) went up.

     “I’m goooooing tooo sing.” She burps, “I’m going to sing, Yellow.” The girl spoke drunkenly. Her friend said something. She leaned down to hear,“Huh? what?” Her friend speaks louder. ”OH,” The girl said standing back up, “by coldplay.” the girl stated. She rolled her eyes, "o _bviously."_

     “I’m Interested in seeing how this ends” said the DJ. Harry stepped back. When did he come stand next to him? The DJ barks a laugh.

     “Whoops, sorry to startle you. You seemed so into observing, I didn’t want to disturb you.” The DJ shrugged. “You also look lonesome, thought you needed some conversation."

Harry ran a hand through his hair. He probably messed up it up in the process. “Ha yeah, sorry.” Harry stated.

The DJ smiles, "Nothing to be sorry ‘bout mate." Harry smiles back. The DJ puts his hand out, ”Zayn Malik, or DJ Malik on stage."

Harry shook Zayn’s hands. “She’ll probably throw up before she finishes.” Harry remarked, avoiding stating his name.

Zayn raises an eyebrow. “Is that a bet?”

Harry decides to make it one, “10 quid she throws up.” 

     “It’s a bet.” Zayn agreed.

     “Look at the stars.

     Look h-how they shine foooOOOR YOU.

     And everything _you do._

     Yeah they were all-”  The girl gags

The crowd becomes chatty. There is murmur about the girl throwing up. 

Zayn steps forward, “No! Keep it in. I have 10 quid on you”

The girl swallows down the puke. Ew.

     “Yell _-oooow._

     I came along.

     I wrote a song _for_ you.

     And it was called ‘Yellow’.  

     So then I took _myyyYYYYY turrrrrrrn._

     Oh what a thing to have done.

     And it was all _Yellllloooooooow”_

The crowd becomes rowdy and people are shouting out  _throw up already._ The room is full of anticipation.

 The girl did a good job. Not the singing bit of course. She was really pitchy. But she did a hell of a job not puking. With covering her mouth or swallowing it down.  Zayn smirks at Harry, “She’s a fighter." Harry flips the bird to him.

     “Your _skiiiiiiin,_

     oh yeah your _skinnnnnnnnn_ and _boooooones,_

 _tuurrrrrrn iiiiiiIIIIIIIIIIntoooooOOOO_ something _beautiiIIfuuuuull,_

     You _knoooooOOOOOw,_

     you know I love yah _sOOOOOOoooo._

     You know I love yah _sooooooooo-”_

The girls gags again. But Harry knows it. She’ll throw up for sure. The crowd is chanting. _"Throw up, throw up, throw up, throw up, throw up."_

Zayn looks horrified. “No, come on,-”

The girl quickly runs across the stage. She ends up throwing up on the edge. Few exclaim “ew”. Everyone else cheered.

Harry turns his head to Zayn smirking. He puts out his hand “10 quid, pay up.”

     “Tell me how you knew.”

Harry sighs, “The heat in here is the main factor, with no air conditioning and the amount of alcohol she clearly has taken, she’s bound to puke.”

     “That's it?” Zayn asks. He says it like that wasn’t enough proof.

     “Also, her neck is very agitated. I can see how red it is all the way back here. It’s a clear sign that she is really drunk. About to puke.”

     “Wow. I’m impressed.” Zayn acknowledge.s “Did you study medical?” Zayn chuckles.

     “Dabbled. Not that into medical.” Harry casually states.

Zayn stares at Harry unbelievably. He has hazel eyes. Pretty. Zayn laughs smiling, eyes crinkling.

     “Hey, pretty boy, pay up” Harry demands cutting Zayn’s laughing fit.

Zayn shakes his head. He mouths profanity while taking 10 quid out of his pocket. “Like you _need_ it. You’re the bloody prince.”

Harry freezes, mouth hanging open. He didn’t say his name. He was hoping not to be spotted “How?- Was it obvious?” Harry asked.

Zayn barks laughing again, He put the money in Harry’s hand, “Everyone knows how you look, Harry. I thought you didn’t state your name because I would already know."

Harry nods, “Should’ve known that being unspotted was something I couldn’t accomplish." He softly said.

Zayn frowns. Harry sounds so sad that that was an impossible idea. He nudges Harry’s shoulder with his. “I’m going to get a drink, want one?” Zayn asks.

Harry shakes his head, “Thanks but I like to have my punch and alcohol separated.”

Zayn grabs Harry’s shoulder, “It was a rhetorical question. You’re getting a drink.”

Zayn grabs Harry’s arm and drags him to the table. He grabs a whole ladle full of punch and puts it in two cups. Harry holds his drink and looks into it. Zayn clinks his cup against Harry’s.

     “To another year of life.” Zayn states before chugging it.

     “Fuck it.” Harry drinks all the punch at once. Zayn’s eyes widen.

     "Damn," Zayn pats Harry’s arm, “You already have the hang of it”

     “With a pretty man beside me, I feel like i’ll do anything you say.” Harry admits.

     “Good thing I feel the same way.” Zayn admits.

Harry smiles. He can feel the alcohol course through his veins. It’s like a slight buzz. It’s nice

~*~

Harry forgets the number of cups of alcohol he drinks after 7. He is really drunk. Being drunk is like being someone who doesn’t think and does whatever they please. The “take all your worries away” drink. It’s kinda cool even though he already knows how bad his hangover is going to be. "Money make her smile" by Bruno Mars starts playing in the background.

_This pretty little thing I swear won't let you down_

_Watch her drop it like_

Harry moves his hips. Girls shake their hair and chest. The whole crowd moves like a wave of the ocean. All in sync together. Zayn is drunkenly grabbing Harry’s hips, moving along with him. The lights change from deep blue to light purple. Zayn looks _so_ damn good. He always did, but with the help of alcohol, Harry realizes just how good Zayn looks. Harry backs away a bit and shakes his shoulders, moving his head to the beat.

_Oh, it’s not complicated, so this won’t take a while. You see, music makes her dance. And money money money make her smile_

The whole crowd is jumping. You can feel the bass around your head. Each drum beat banging against the inside of your skull. Harry keeps closing his eyes to feel like he transports to nothingness but music. And when he opens them all he sees is Zayn, and how hot he looks. His long eyelashes defining his hazel eyes. And the stubble he hasn’t shaved showing how sharp his cheekbones, it turns him on way more than it needs too. Harry then lets himself grab Zayn’s hands. Zayn moves closer. Each step matching to the beat. Harry’s hands close in Zayn’s and pulls him to his body until there isn’t any space left between them. Zayn bites his lip and Harry smirks. They move their bodies against each other to the beat

_Yeah_

_\- Yeah_

_\- Yeah_

_Watch her_

The beat drops

Zayn leans up and kisses Harry. And because alcohol has completely shut down his brain, Harry kisses him back. Their lips move languidly together. Harry grunts and bites Zayn’s bottom lip. He looks up to see his reaction. Zayn eyes are pleasantly surprised, all glassy. It’s priceless.

The song ends and the lights stop changing. Some Girl goes up to the microphone. “It’s almost 11:47. Can anyone find the Birthday Boy?”

It takes a few seconds for Harry to realize that people are going to look at him. And he is still currently kissing Zayn. Harry apologizes to Zayn for breaking the kiss. He then moves away. The people around them point, “Found him.”

     “Ah! Come on up, Harry!” The girl exclaims motioning him up stage.

Harry cuts through the crowd and walks up the stage. Zayn chuckles to himself because Harry looks wrecked. His lips are red and bitten and his hair is mussed. It was all his fault. 

Harry coughs before he speaks into the microphone. “Thank you all for coming. And a massive thank you for the people who organized this.” Harry motioned the building “It means alot. Most of my life I was the kid who never got a great childhood. I never had any real friends. I’m basically a child of those charity cases." The crowd laughs. “But this. This is so special. It’s something i’m proud that you guys organized for me. If we are talking person to person, i'm no more different from you. I never really experienced a party that was like the ones you guys would get. If i’m honest, its way more better than dance balls.” The crowd cheers. “Anyways I need to sum this up or i’ll be here forever. There is no words to explain my love for you guys doing this. Thank you.” The crowd whoops. _“Harry!”_  

The girl from before speaks again, “Now for the cake.” She steps to the side and two people push the cake on stage. The cake is 10 tiers high and on top is a fondant figure of him wearing a top hat and monocle. He is leaning on a cane with his leg crossing his other leg.

     “Very posh.” Harry said looking at the girl. She swoons. He rolls his eyes. 

Everybody joins in to sing happy birthday.   _Happy Birthday to you._ Harry looks at the crowd. They all are happily drunk singing for him. _Happy birthday to you._ Harry finds Zayn in the crowd. _Happy Birthday to, Harry. Happy Birth Day to you._

Harry turns around to the cake, “Let them have cake.” He joked.

No one laughed

He got the first  two pieces ~~and the figurine, shhh.~~ The helpers cut the cake and distribute them. Harry dismisses himself and jumps down the stage. Harry walks up to Zayn handing him a piece of cake.

     “Thank you.” Zayn said taking the cake.

     “No problem.” Harry stated before biting into the cake. Mmmm, red velvet. “Drinking then eating cake is the best combination."

Zayn nods agreeing. He nudged Harry to get his attention. Harry looks at Zayn and shrugs "What do you want?". He motions going outside. Harry nods.

~*~

Outside smells faintly of smoke from the people before. The sky is complete black with the stars looking like light bulbs. Harry spots a tree. He jogs to it and sits on the grass. Zayn catches up. Harry pats the area next to him and Zayn sits down.

     “You like the cake?” Harry asks. He finished his cake already. The alcohol is coming back to him.

     “More of a chocolate fan," Zayn starts then steals the fondant figurine from Harry, “But it’s good." 

Harry pouts. Zayn waves the figurine in Harry’s face, sticking his tongue out. 

     “Not fair.” Harry protests. 

     “Get over it princess.” Zayn playfully replied.

Harry sighs, “You’re beautiful."

     “And you’re pissed drunk.” Zayn laughs.

Harry pretends to be offended, “And you’re not?” He leans forward again.

Zayn does the same, whispering “Yeah, I am. But I don’t do stupid things when I’m drunk.” 

Harry shoves Zayn, “You’re the one who kissed me."

     “But you kissed me back, so you obviously like boys.” Zayn states. 

Harry then freezes. He stares at Zayn and He burrows his eyebrows.

     “What’s wrong? Did I say something?” Zayn panics. Harry doesn’t respond. Zayn stands up looking at Harry carefully. 

Harry looks up to him. “No….” Harry looks at the ground, “You did nothing wrong.” 

Zayn is _so_ lost. Harry was flirting with him all night. In the beginning it could’ve just been friendly interaction, but when he dared to kiss him, Harry kissed back. So it was obvious it wasn’t friendly. Now he just states the facts that he likes boys and he freezes. 

     “Then what is it?” Zayn asks. 

Harry plays with his hands, “It’s complicated." He couldn’t look at Zayn. He instead focused on a patch of grass. He felt Zayn sit beside him.

     “You can talk to me.” Zayn softly said. Harry peeked up at him. Zayn gave him a small smile. How in hell did Harry end up finding Zayn? Kind, beautiful, thoughtful Zayn. He was the one who made him want to be existent in his _own_ party. He made him have a good time.

Harry sighs, “I never really….thought of what I am. You know, like my sexual orientation. I just thought I haven’t met any girl that special yet. But what happened tonight.” He looks at Zayn. His face flushes. “You know…”

Zayn lays flat on his back on the grass. He puts his hands on his stomach. “They told me that too. I did end up with a girl but I also found myself wating to date boys." Harry's eyes widen. "But That’s perfectly okay, Harry. You don’t need to define yourself. Just do what feels comfortable to you." Zayn spits out.

Harry leans over Zayn smiling.

     “So you’re bi?”

     “Yeah.”

     “That’s actually a good thing.”

 Zayn raises his eyebrow, “What? How?” 

     “It’d be a shame if only girls or guys got to date you. You’re really beautiful.”

Zayn giggles at that. Then harry lies down with him. The sky was pretty. It was a full moon and stars were covering the night.

     "But you know, Harry." Zayn starts. Harry turns his head to him. "You can't change your sexual orientation." Harry stares blanky at him. "Also only _you_  get to choose how to define yourself."

Harry chuckles. "I know." Harry and Zayn smile to each other. "Thank you anyways."

“Pressure” by the 1975 then plays from inside. They could go inside again but it seemed better outside.

 _Change in pressure, Never going lie to you_.

 Music was slightly muffled and the chill of the night washed over them. Harry closed his eyes.

     “Zayn, mate, glad I found ya.” Someone said.

The voice seemed familiar.

Zayn got up and hugged the boy. “Niall, how are you?”

Harry opens his eyes wide. _Niall?_. Like the one he met the first time he snuck out of the castle Niall?

     “Great, party is the craic. Who’s your friend?” Niall asked.

Zayn turned around. He was going to introduce him but Harry beat him to the punch. Harry sat up slowly, “Harry, nice to meet you again." He smiled.

Niall grinned, “Yo, why didn’t you tell me you got to meet the prince?” He asked Zayn.

“Gotta ask the same to you, Niall.” Zayn asked Niall crossing his arms.

Harry stood up. “Didn’t know you two know each other. Niall, did you ever get the teacher off your arse from writing “Twat” in permanent marker on the whiteboard?”

 Niall laughed, “That will be my best prank ever." He looked at the ground then up. "And no.”

Zayn nudged Niall’s arm. “You gotta tell me the story of how you met Harry before me later." Niall nodded.

     “So how did you meet Harry?” Niall asked Zayn.  Both Harry and Zayn flushed.

     “Harry was in the back hiding out, but I found him and made him enjoy his party.” Zayn explained poking Harry’s side. Weights lifts off his shoulders.

     “Ah, makes sense. Awkward then, still awkward now.” Niall said.

 _"Hey."_ Harry said offended.

     “Kidding, Harry.” Niall said to Harry. He mouthed _not at all_ to Zayn.

     “Anyways, I needed to tell you I’m gunna crash at a girl’s place so don’t worry about me.” Niall explained to Zayn.

     “Alright but use protection.” Zayn smirked. Niall flicked Zayn off before running to the road. Zayn turned to Harry.

     “What now?” Harry asked. 

     “Want to get drinks?” Zayn suggests.

     “Do you just want to get drunk enough for me to kiss you?” Harry joked crossing his arms.

     "Do I need to get drunk to get permission to kiss you?” Zayn asked. Harry is still drunk, and Zayn is open for a kiss so what stopped him from kissing Zayn then and there? The fact it’s 2 am and he doesn’t feel like doing anything stupid.

     “I don’t know but I’m sorry, Zayn. I need to go home. I’ll text you later though." Harry said.

Zayn’s face fell for a bit but then noded at Harry. Harry waved goodbye walking away. Zayn grabbed Harry’s arm and whispered in his ear, “Happy Birthday. You looked so gorgeous." Then Zayn kissed Harry’s earlobe.

It took all his willpower to continue walking

~*~

When his ride home came Harry opened the door and lied on the back seat. He can feel the hangover coming. He closed the door with his foot.

     “How was it?” The cabbie asked.

Harry had his hand over his eyes, alcohol is taken a burden on him now. “ ‘M sorry just,” He wiped his face, “tired to talk."

     “No, no it’s fine.” The cabbie understood.

Harry's seeing things. The car is morphing into different shapes. The floor of the car seemed like a bottomless pit. Like he can fall into it any time. Harry rolled closer to the seats. Despite the fact that it’s 2 am, loads of cars were on the road. Every time someone honked it was like their were puncturing a hole in his skull. He thinks he might have motion sickness. But he _needs_ to go home so he tries to bare it. Harry passes out and images of Zayn appear. Him leaning on the wall. His black swirled hair with that damn blonde streak. Zayn’s long eyelashes tickling his cheeks when he kissed him. So this is what his birthday was ended up all about. It felt like an entire lifetime passed when he reached his home.

~*~

Harry got out of the car and tried walking. It was like playing damn ‘qwop’. “Never drink again.” Harry said to himself. He lost his balance. All of it. _Poof!_ Balance magically disappeared. He’ll never get to the house. He took one step. “Good, yeah. now just-” Harry lifted his other foot but fell, front hitting the pavement. “Fuck this.” Harry crawled up to the patio. He somehow stands up and unlocks the entrance of the castle. He carefully put his blazer on the coat hanger. He can hear heels clicking on the tile floor.

     “Oh for fuck sake’s, Harry.” Anne sighed.

     “Hello, Mum.”

     “Did you drink?” Anne said crossing her arms.

 _shit._ He wasn’t supposed to drink?  “ ‘M sorry mum”

Anne rolls her eyes, “Okay so you are at least brain operated. I should’ve known there was going to be alcohol. I’m not mad at that.”

Harry’s eyes widened, “You’re not?”

     “No," Anne stepped closer. Her eyes pierced through his. You know you fucked up if Anne is being stern with you. “It’s the fact that it’s _**BLOODY 2 AM! What gave you the thought that you could go out for so long?"** _ She spat.

Harry grabbed the coat hanger for sturdiness. “Um…..”

Des then came out from the kitchen. “ **Very** disappointed, Harry."

Harry has a huge lump in his throat. Tears threaten to roll down his cheeks. "I don’t know what to say."

Des took a deep sigh, “Harry, I know it’s your birthday but you can’t stay out late.” His voice became louder.

Harry could feel his eyes burn, “Why not?!” He spat

Anne and Des stared even harder at Harry. “Have you lost your god damn mind?” Anne asked.

Harry now is becoming full of rage, “Maybe. Or maybe I finally realized what I needed.”

     “What are you going on about?” Des asked. Everyone’s voices are now raised.

     “You _never_ let me go out. Everyday I was stuck in this damn castle. I spent my time learning about the kingdom while I never even _explored_ the kingdom.” Harry exclaimed. There’s tears running down his face and he feels dumb. But he can’t stop arguing.

Des fake laughed at Harry,“You _did too_ get out. Remember dance? You had a reason to go out. _You’re the one who quit._ ”

Harry felt like ripping his hair out. He clenched his fist. “ **I didn’t** **_like_ dance** ,That’s why. Also, I don’t need a _reason_ to go out. A person needs to get out. But I was stuck here trying to entertain myself. I had little interaction. You got to eat out to restaurants and go to business meetings.”

Des squinted his eyes at Harry, “Did you want me to bring you to the meetings? Is that what this is?”

Harry angrily wiped his face. “No, That’s not what I’m trying to get here. I wished you let me go out and interact with the citizens. Let me get to know the kingdom.” What Harry didn’t mention was the fact that he had to figure out how to sneak out of the castle just to get out once in a while.

     “You’re a spoiled brat. You know that right? You have privileges others don’t have.” Harry rolls his eyes, he heard this a million times “You have a roof over your head. You don’t have that many responsibilities. And you can pay for anything you want.” Des spat out.

     “Okay, boys calm dow-” Anne tried to intervene.

 

     “ _OH!_ What is being alone with parents who never tried to see what their child is feeling when you get to be a prince? What’s having less friends than your parents when you’re prince? What’s being socially impaired when you’re prince? You don’t think I weighed out the pros and cons of being royalty? I’ve done it million of times. You know what I get? I get that being prince is the worst.” Harry screamed.

Des looked at Harry. Both were breathing heavily. “How _dare_ you. You know that’s not-”

Harry furrowed his eyebrows.

     “Des? Love?” Anne asked.

Des then fainted. Panic washed over Harry. He checked his pulse. Non-existent.

     “Mum.” Harry started, panic clear in her eyes.

     “What is it?” Anne asked.

     “His pulse is gone. Call the ambulance.”

Anne ran to the kitchen’s phone calling 9-1-1, “Hello? Yes, my husband just fainted.”

Harry laid Des flat on his back. He pushed his chin up while pushing the forehead down, tilting Des’ head. He’s not breathing. Harry breathes in and leans his mouth to Des’ to give two full breaths. He places the heel of his hands on his chest, making sure to not let his fingers touch Des’ body, and pushes down twice.

     “Oh come on, Dad.” Harry cried.

He keeps doing CPR. Every unsuccessful try takes a bit of hope away. By the fifth try Harry is sobbing. “'Im sorry, Dad. Please, come back. I love you, please." Harry’s breathing is uneven, he’s a slobbering mess. He keeps shaking. _Another try_ Harry thinks. _He can come back.Just, don’t give up._ His shaking hands pushes down on his dad’s chest. He breaths in but he chokes on tears. _No, not now. Not on my birthday. I don’t want to lose my father on my fucking birthday._ He breaths in and leans over. Des’ face is so peaceful. His eyes are closed, wrinkles defining his face. And he missed the spot he always does when he shaves. Harry caressed his father’s face. It was still warm. Like he's still living. Tears blur his vision. He’s about to hug his father when paramedics take his body on a stretcher.

     “No.” Harry’s voice breaks. “Let me, let me hug my father.” None of the paramedics seem to hear him. “Just let me-”

The paramedics left the stretcher on to the ambulance. Shut the doors and on they went.

The last thing Harry remembers that day was hearing Anne cry next to him with Des’ body covered with a blanket.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you enjoyed the chapter, make sure to comment! thank you.


	4. The Five Stages of Grief and Loss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SO SORRY I TOOK SO LONG TO UPDATE. IS ANYONE READING THIS?

Harry looked around. The hospital was empty. The only sound to hear was Anne’s breathing. Her eyes were dark caused by days’ missed of sleep. At least she got some sleep in her Harry thought. He sat up on the seats.

_Harry_

He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. Where was that coming from? He put his feet to the cold floor. He wrapped his arms around himself to stop his shivering.

     “Bloody hospital, get some heating would you?”

_This is all your fault_

Harry stood up and turned to the door behind him. The voice was unrecognizable. It was soft but it had a edge to it. Guilt was pooling around his stomach.

     “Who is it?” Harry asked

_You are ungrateful. But you already know that._

Every sentence cut him deep. He didn’t exactly recognized who it was but he knew. Harry walked across and opened the door. He gasped.

_You’re the reason why I'm dead. Des was standing there like the day of Harry’s birthday._

     “Dad…” Harry weakly protested.

     “This is all your fault.” Des stated. Harry wanted to back away but he was frozen in his tracks. His expression fell. Des’ eyes were pure black and he was sinisterly smiling.

     “I didn’t-I didn’t mean to.” Harry words broke as he sobbed. “You can’t be dead. Dad, please."

     “I'm right here for you, boy.” Des said voice suddenly changing. He tilted his head in a frown. “I promised you I would never leave you, right?”

Harry felt a tad bit better. Just a tad. Harry choked then smiled.

     “Dad, you scared me. You know I didn’t mean to- I'm just glad you’re alright."

He opened his arms and ran to his dad. When he wrapped his arms around Des, Des’ arms wrapped around him. He rubbed circles on Harry’s arm.

     "It’s okay, Harry. I'm here, I’ll always be." Des whispered against harry’s head.

Harry felt empty. He should be happy but something wasn’t right. He leaned back and looked at Des. He raised his eyebrows in question while Harry furrowed his eyebrows. Des was here. He had a heart attack but he survived. His dad is back, that’s all Harry wished in his prayers the last few days. Harry planned that Des would survive, ground Harry naturally and they would continue with their lives back at the castle. The castle that started their argument. But Harry would live with it.

     “Where’s everybody?” Harry asked Des like he would know the answer.

Des shrugged saying “Dunno, I just came back from the hospital son.”

Harry slowly released himself from the hug. He looked around. Where was everybody? Where was his mother? He realized the hospital was empty, that no one was around. Even the workers. It was as if the hospital was closed.

     “Now,” Des started. Harry looked at Des. “Harry, I need you to not panic."

Harry became confused, “Panic? About what?”

     “Just, just be a good boy for me yeah? Take care of your mother.” Des finished.

     “What? Dad, what are you-”

Then the room got cold. Des faded out and Harry’s breath got faster. What is happening? The room’s colors dripped out like a melting popsicle. Harry was hyperventilating and the black and white room disappeared to black.

 

~*~

 

     “Harry!” Anne screamed

Harry burst out of his duvet. The room was spinning. He felt the sweat beading on his forehead. What just happened? When did he come to his room?

     “Harry, calm down. Take deep breaths.” Anne instructed.

Des was just here. Where is he? Did Harry imagine that or did that happen before? He would never know. Harry then recognized his mother’s voice. He took a deep breath in. 1,2,3,4,5. He exhaled. The room finally came in focus. He turned his head to see Anne. Her face was stained with running mascara. Harry blinked his eyes to clear his vision. Anne’s chest flattened when she released her breath. The corners of her mouth twitched.

     “Oh, Harry,” She said breathless. She reached over and grabbed his chin. “It’s great to see you awake again."

     “Huh? How long was I out?” Harry asked confused with Anne’s comment.

     “Oh, Darling,” Anne’s voice broke, “It’s been three days. I thought you were-” Her mouth wobbled. Anne quickly moved harry’s body to her chest.

     “How...Has it really been days?” Harry asked.

Anne broke into sobs. Harry wrapped his arms around his mother. He felt a pain his chest. No one can bear their mother crying. Anne nodded. She leaned back and carded her fingers in his hair.

     “I was alone for a few days. It was probably for the best”

     “What about Norma? The house servants?”

Anne gave a small smile, “I told them they can have a few days off”

Harry lifted his hands while raising an eyebrow.

Anne let out a chuckle “I wanted to mourn in peace, I guess."

Harry never realized how small his mom was compared to him. Anne gave up her straight posture. Harry frowned at his mother. He held her hand. The door was shut and it seemed to be late night. The blinds were drawn closed and the room had a blue hue. The winds whirled outside and was the only sound to be heard. Harry remembers holding his mother in his arms before they passed out in silence.

 

~*~

 

The next morning Harry woke up with his duvet thrown to the ground. The castle was cold but it didn’t bother him. It actually helped him in a way. It kept him aware. Kept him from passing out of drainage. He thought of it like a punishment. Harry’s body is heavy and refuses to move. He gets up somehow and drags himself to the bathroom. He ignores the light switch and looks at his reflection. His dark circles are accentuated, his hair is a greasy and flat. The clothes he was wearing were wrinkled from carelessness. He knows he looks awful but he does nothing to change the fact. He walks down the too-long stairs and smells eggs. He walks across the center hall, living room, and entertainment room to reach the kitchen. Anne is in her robe and sweat pants. Her hair is in a careless bun and she is slouching flipping the eggs. Harry trudges in and puts a kettle on the stove. Anne looks up to Harry and attempts to smile.

     “Morning.” Harry peeps but his voice is filled with sleep.

     “Morning.” Anne says quietly.

Harry thinks that they say ‘morning’ instead of ‘good morning’ because they both know they would be lying if they did. It could also be because they somehow created a silence not meant to be broken. A silence they both agreed to keep. Like they both are waiting for a special someone to break it. Someone who isn’t here anymore. Someone they irrationally hope would come back and bring back the normal situation.

Anne crabs three plates and Harry gets three table cloths out. He places one on the end, one in the middle, and one next to the middle. He sits in his seat and Anne puts his plate on his, one on hers, and one on the end. Anne comes around and sits on her seat ; her seat next to Harry. They pick at their food. Harry stabs the egg and lays it in his mouth. He moves it around and drags it down his throat. Anne wants turns to the empty seat.

     “Des, babe, will you-?”

Harry stops his chewing and Anne slouches even deeper. The silence went out the window. Anne and Harry look at the extra breakfast that has been placed. Harry silently swallows his egg and places his fork down on the table. Anne cries out a low sob. Harry turns to his mother and holds her hand. Like he was her anchor. He grabs her and rubs his hand on Anne’s shoulder. Anne sniffs her nose.

     “It’s like he’s still here.” Anne whispers. Her head is on Harry’s chest and she whispers it again. “Its like. He’s. Still here.”

Harry only has the strength to nod.

 

~*~

 

Harry decides that food is worthless and that he can’t bare making anymore mistakes. It seemed perfectly normal but when he and his mother acknowledged his father’s absence it seemed all too quick. Harry gets an extra blanket and lets it engulf him. He plays music on his earbuds on full blast.

 

_Come on, oh my star is fading. And I swerve out of control. If I, if I only waited. I won’t be stuck here in this hole._

 

The sky is dark again. The kids that usually are running down the street are gone. In fact, as far as he can see, the city is empty.

 

_Come on, oh my star is fading. And I swerve out of control. And I swear, I waited and waited._

_I’ve got to get out of this hole._

_And time, is on your side. It’s on your side, now. Not pushing you down, and all around, it’s no cause for concern._

 

Harry’s phone rings him out of his daze. He never thought of his social media. What would they assume happened? He wiggles his arm out and unlocks his phone.

 

 **Are you okay? Haven’t heard you in a while. Call me whenever. I'm worried.** Zayn, today 10:43 am

 

Zayn texts him? Since when? Harry goes to his messages and there are 3 unread messages.

 

 **Hey, babe. Wanna chill later? Had a great time yesterday ;)** zayn, February 2 8:14 pm

 **You know, if you don’t want me around at least tell me.** zayn, February 3 5:32 pm

 **Alright, ignore me. I still think we had at least a great potential friendship** zayn, February 3 6:27

 **I just heard the news. Are you okay?! I'm here if needed**. zayn, February 4 9:56

 

Harry completely forgot about Zayn. Okay, maybe not. That sounds harsh. Zayn was the last thing on Harry’s mind. That fits more well. Harry texts: _Sorry, I'm not in the mood. I just need time. text you when I'm less crap._

He continues listening to his sad music on blast.

 

~*~

 

And Harry wakes up, drinks water, eats something if he’s lucky, and passes out listening to his music on his window sill.

 

~*~

 

And repeat for a month

 

~*~

 

Harry falls out of bed. He screams in agonizing pain from landing sharply on back. He stands up grunting. He walks into his bathroom and looks at his back in the mirror. No actual wound but it will leave a bad bruise. He groans. _Fuck, I can’t get anything right._ He washes his face with cold water. He steps down the staircase. He doesn’t hear the usual frying sounds from the kitchen so he speed walks into the kitchen. When he enters the kitchen Anne is pouring herself another glass of whiskey. Harry clenches his fists standing in the doorway. Anne turns her head to the sound and smiles drunkenly to Harry.

     “Well, if it isn’t my beautiful son, Harry.” She pushes her chair back and stands up wobbly.

     “How many have you had?” Harry says trying to push his annoyance aside.

Anne waves her hand. “How many glasses, you mean?”

Harry nods his head slowly. He steps forward and puts his hand out for Anne to give him the whiskey. Anne steps back but it almost costs her balance. She crabs the whiskey bottle in her other hand and holds it close.

     “I don’t know what you have been doing, but this is how I vent.” Anne defends herself.

     “I’ve most certainly not been getting drunk off my arse, that’s damn sure.” Harry replies through clenched teeth.

Anne leans too forward and squints her eye, “What are you getting off about? Why you so mad?”

     “I'm mad because the last time someone was drunk they had a argument with their parent and costed their lives. I'm not doing that again.” Harry explains. He lunges forward and attempts to take the whiskey away but Anne dodges it.

     “That was your fault, and you know it.” Anne said waving her hand with the glass in the air. She swallows and blinks hard, “And you’re not my mum. Stop acting like you are in charge, Harold."

Harry wipes his face. Anne acts like a bratty teenager when she is drunk.

     “Just put the whiskey away, Mum.”

He grabs her wrists and she struggles against him. Anne looks straight at Harry. Her face reads anger and hurt.

     “Harry, stop. Let me go.” Anne said loud and clear. She lowers her eyebrows and looks at Harry.

     “No, mum, seriously. You need to stop. I don’t want you to become an alcoholic.” Harry said sternly.

Anne rolls her eyes, “I'm not going to become an alcoholic. I'm just venting.”

Harry snatches the wine glass. Anne slouches.

     “At least alcohol is there for me.”

Harry places the wine glass behind him. Then he raises one of his eyebrows.

     “Really?” Harry puts his hand on his hip. “We’re going there?”

Anne throws her head back, “Yes. Yes we are. Because while I'm down here taking care of this house, you’re up there doing,” Anne grabs the wine glass and smashes it on the ground, “god knows what. You left me, Harry. You left me here with my bad decisions." When Anne’s head is back facing forward her eyes are teary. Harry starts to cry. He slouches and looks at his mother.

     “Mum. I'm sorry.” He hugs her and they cry into each other’s shoulders. “This is all my fault. It was the alcohol speaking about my stupid ass rants and it-” Harry’s words get caught. “-It, it killed him.”

Anne shakes her head. “It’s no one’s personal fault. We all had a factor in it. And after all, we can’t do anything about it.."

They end up sleeping in the living room, Both leaving Des’ seat empty.

 

~*~

 

It has been 3 months since the incident and Anne hired back all the castle workers. After a conference meeting, they agreed that the Queen would be in control of the kingdom. Harry has been dealing with this well but he gets random bursts of anger. It’s mostly when he sees anything related to alcohol. He has wrote down a tally mark everytime he did on his wrist in ink. And all along Harry has kept his phone in his pocket. He turned off all notifications and wasn’t talking to anyone online. He thought that somehow if he kept it around he would build the courage to talk to Zayn again. Or to see if Zayn would break the silence first. But it’s been 3 fucking months. He can’t decide if Zayn’s obedience of harry’s orders was good or bad. The phone is dead weight to Harry. Harry pulls it out and lays it on his bed in front of him. He decides to text back. Why not? He is feeling better. Harry holds his phone and lays his finger on the power button. What would he text? “Hey, I'm not depressed but I'm pissed as hell, will you hang out with me?” Harry decides that this is bloody stupid and just lets it come to him. He unlocks his phone and goes to Zayn’s contact.

Things have been tough, but I feel better. Can we chill later?

Harry sends it and puts his phone down before he can think twice. Two seconds later Zayn replies.

Glad you’re feeling better, love. Do I come over or will you come over?

Harry sits on his bed with his phone in hand. He ponders over if he should let Zayn come over. Harry thinks why not, but then he remembers that the castle is for business and that Anne most likely won’t let Zayn come over. Harry gets up and walks down the way-too-long stairs.

     “Mum.” Harry screams. It echos across the castle.

     “Over here, darling” Anne answers across the castle.

He walks to the office with his oversized sweater lazily slides over his shoulder. Anne has her reading glasses on when Harry perks his head in.

     “Busy?” Harry asks

Anne waves her hand while the other slides her glasses off.

     “No, not at all. Come and sit.”

Harry opens the door to let himself in and sits in the chair across. Anne gathers up her paperwork before she turns to Harry.

     “What is it, babe?” Anne asks sweetly.

     “Oh, um, well I was wondering,” Harry starts out slowly and he sinks into the chair. “Well, there is. Um, there’s a guy, Zayn, thats his name. I was wondering if,” Harry rubs his hand over his wrist. “,can he come over?” Harry finishes and looks back at Anne.

Anne blows a raspberry. “To the castle?” She tilts her head.

He knew it. Zayn won’t be able to come over.

     “Yeah.” Harry said awkwardly.

     “Oh, Darling. I'm so busy and you know we can’t have casual guests over." Anne answers frowning a bit.

Harry stands up, starting to leave the room.

      “I know, I know. So..” Harry turns around and looks at Anne. “I'm going to his place then?”

Anne furrows his eyebrows.

     “Honey, I don’t even know this kid and you think I'm going to let you go to his place?”

Harry really hasn’t thought this through. He should’ve just left out of his window.

     “Well, no. I don’t think you would."

     “So?” Anne asks.

Harry can tell Anne is concerned now. She walks up to Harry and looks into his eyes.

     “I'm sorry, Mum. It was a stupid idea.” Harry forced out a chuckle and shakes his head. He walks out of the door and goes to his room. He would just go to his room again and listen to arctic monkeys on repeat.

     “Harry, wait!” Anne demands.

Harry spins around. Anne’s face is soft. Harry waits for her to continue speaking.

     “You can go if you want. You need it really.” Anne chuckles.

Harry smiles and goes up to hug his mom.

     “Thank you!”

Anne releases Harry.

     “Don’t do anything stupid.” Anne says pointing her finger to him teasingly.

     “No promises.” Harry replies jokingly

 

~*~

 

Harry has put on a beanie and proper jeans when he is outside. Harry grabs his phone and calls Zayn.

 _"_ _Hey mate! Nice to see you active again”_

Harry sighs. “It’s nice to hear your voice again.”

Zayn giggles. _“Same to you. So, what’s the plan?”_

     “I'm coming over to you. Where’s your place at?” Harry says walking down the driveway.

_“Oh, I'm actually currently at a music store. You can meet me there if ya want.”_

Harry stops in his track. “Okay. Which one?”

 _“The one next to the city park. I can meet you halfway too if you want. You know, so you don’t walk too much.”_ Zayn says. Harry can hear over the phone Zayn sitting up and walking out the door.

     “That’ll be perfect. What about the petrol station?”

 _“Sure.”_ Zayn says. Harry can hear his footsteps over the phone.

     “Perfect.” Harry repeats simply. They walk in silence for a minute. “So…..”

_“So.”_

     “You work there or something?” Harry asks trying to make conversation.

 _“The music store? Yeah and I love getting my vinyls there. When you called I just got out of my shift. Was about to go to my house.”_ Zayn says

     “You have vinyls? I have a few but I don’t have a record player so...” Harry chuckles and Zayn joins him over the phone.

 _"They’re useless?”_ Zayn laughs.

     “Pretty much” Harry says with the last bit of laughter.

 _“Well, you fell off the face of earth and ignored me. What kept you busy?”_ Zayn asks.

     “Sorry ‘bout that again.” Harry looks around. He’s nearly at the station. “Well other than despair, blasting music and sleep really.” There’s silence over the phone and Harry knew in the back in his mind it was going to be like this. Harry would talk about mourning and Zayn would try to help but really no one can. Unless they can bring Des from the dead.

_“Who have you been listening to?”_

So they weren’t going to talk about it. “The xx, Arctic Monkeys, The Strokes,...” Harry said.

 _“So indie rock, got it._ ” Zayn interrupted.

     “Don’t interrupt me, Malik." Harry teased.

 _"Fine, then you won’t get the vinyl. More for me, Styles.”_ Zayn said. Harry can imagine the smirk on his face.

     “Don’t matter, I don’t own a record player.” Harry replied simply but he was touched at the thought that Zayn got him a vinyl. He reached the petrol station before Zayn. He looked around to see if He was close.

_“Hey! I was thinking that if you wanted to hear your vinyl you’d come over my flat. It’s just another excuse for you to see me.”_

Harry rolled his eyes before looking across the road. Zayn finally arrived. Harry waves and shouts his name. Zayn turns his head and waves back. The phone connection dies.  
Zayn runs across the street. He stands in front of him.

     “What’s Happening??”

Zayn has his hair down with his blonde streak peeking underneath. He has black jeans, combat boots, and a maroon hoodie. Overall, good as usual.

     “Waiting for you.” Harry says. “Where to now?”

Zayn pulls a cigarette out of his hoodie and places it between his lips. “Dunno. How you feel about going for lunch?”

Harry stares at Zayn, eyeing the cigarette. Harry always seen cigarettes but he always remembers the time with Anne. His mum was in her bathroom blowing out smoke through the window. Harry walked in and wrinkled his nose at the smell. Of course he was 7 at the time so anything other than something sweet smelling he found disgusting. Mum? Harry would say. His mum would turn around and instantly bud the cigarette. Yes, Darling? Anne would reply. What was that? Anne’s face held a steady smile. It was nothing, let’s go out to the park, yeah?

     “Mate.” Zayn said breaking Harry’s daze.

Harry blinked twice then looked at Zayn.

     “You can tell me if you don’t want me smoking around you. If you are like that I have no problem with it.” He explained.

Harry smiled at his shoes and chuckled. “I'm okay with it,” Harry then laughed “just was remembering something.”

Zayn smiled with the cigarette hanging. He nodded before he cursed that the damn wind won’t let him have a smoke. Harry cuffed his hands around the flame and the cigarette finally lit. Zayn loosely grabbed Harry’s arm.

     “Thanks."

The smoke smelled tangy. Both then walked down the pavement.

     “You still haven’t answered the question.” Zayn said simply, breaking the silence.

Harry looked to Zayn and raised his eyebrows in question.

     “Do you want to grab lunch?” Zayn repeated.

Harry shaped his mouth into a ‘o’, he now remembered.

     “I think you need to go out more often. You’re starting to get memory loss.”

     “Sorry. You must have said it when I was daydreaming.” Harry said.

Zayn looked at him teasingly. Harry shoved him.

     “Shut up. I'm not having memory loss.” Harry smiled, so did Zayn. “Anyways, I would like to grab lunch, but let’s have a picnic at the park." Harry finally answered.

     “That’d be great” Zayn said plainly. Harry’s face lit up. “If it were not bloody cold as hell. Why did I agree I can spend time with you?”

Harry's face fell but gathered himself up.

     “You did it because I have been moping around and you have stupidly decided to be my friend.” Harry explained.

     “Friend, right.” Zayn said quickly. “Here’s another idea then,” Zayn stopped in his tracks. Harry then stopped to and turned to him. “we can go get something to snack on and come to my house. With central heating."

     “Deal.” Harry said and jokingly took out his hand. Zayn followed along and shook Harry’s hand.

     “Good, now what can we get for only 10?” Zayn asked.

 

~*~

 

They got biscuits, coke, and hair wax. Hair wax because Zayn ran out of it back at his flat. When they reached the complex they pushed the fifth floor button. Harry rubbed his hands together to create warmth. The weather has slowly became cold.

    “Damn, I should’ve brought more than just this lousy sweater.” Harry cursed.

Zayn then took off his hoodie and put it around Harry’s shoulders. Harry looked to Zayn and it was breath taking. His hair was perfectly styled, the shirt underneath fit around his shoulders but was loose around the rest, and the cigarette in between his lips smoke created a hazy background.

Zayn turned to Harry. “No problem” He said.

Harry cursed to himself. “Sorry. Thank you.”

The lift’s door opened with a ding. Harry and Zayn both walked in. When they were inside and Harry properly put the hoodie on, they stood in silence. Harry swung his right foot with his hands in the hoodie’s pocket. Zayn stood to the left of him and leaned against the frame. The vapor of the smoke slowly engulfed the elevator and Harry felt drunk again. It’s supposed to be high, but Harry hasn’t ever gotten high. Still the same feeling overall. His eyelids drooped. He took a deep breath. Zayn then tapped Harry. He turned his head. Zayn leaned on Harry and blew out the last of his cigarette.

     “How are those?” Harry asked.

Zayn looked to Harry. “Cigarettes?”

Harry noded.

     “They’re okay. They don’t taste as good as they feel. Suppose the first time you smoke you don’t get hooked right away. But then you think of trying it again.” Zayn turned his head. “Why? You thinking of smoking?”

Harry shook his head. “No, never have. But other than you, I only know one person who smokes.” The lift’s bell rang.

     “Who?” Zayn asked curiously.

     “My Mum.” Harry nonchalantly walked out of the lift waiting for Zayn to join him.

Zayn laughed. Harry could not figure out why. Probably because of how Harry answered it. Or maybe because Harry seemed like a curious eight year old. Either way Harry did not get offended.They walked down the corridor and stopped at 45F. Zayn took out his keys and unlocked the door. He walked in and spread his arms out.

     “This is my home.”

Harry closed the door behind him and gave a small smile. The flat had walls full of spray paintings and brown corduroy seats. And the smallest kitchen Harry ever saw was to the left of the entrance.

     “You got a nice place.” Harry stated. He went up to a spray painting of batman. “Did you do all of this?”

Zayn burst out smiling. Harry could tell then and there that Zayn takes pride in his art.

     “Yeah I did. It took loads of compromises for the landlord and my parents to agree.”

Zayn walked to the living room and Harry followed. The wall had flowers,vines, and a sun set. He nudged Harry.

     “Made entirely out of little dabs of my fingers.”

Harry stood closer to the mural. Indeed, the whole painting had little dots in the shape of a fingertip. Zayn continued looking at Harry to see his reaction.

Harry’s eyes widened. “It’s amazing, Zayn. This must have taken days. Especially when you had to wash your hands in between dabs.”

He turned his head. Zayn huffed his chest out in pride and his mouth slacked in impressed manner.

     “Yes it did take long. But I was feeling restless so I did most of it in one night.” Zayn tilted his head. “Did you also major in art?” He asked Harry.

Harry shrugged. “Not majored. But I did study for a year.”

Zayn stared at Harry. He swore Harry knew anything. “Do you study everything?” Zayn asked.

     "No, only things I find interesting.” Harry explains.

     "You know more than me, kid.” Zayn joked.

     “What a shame.” Harry teases.

Zayn walks to the kitchen and pulls out the biscuits. Harry joins and turns on the kettle. After the kettle is filled with water Harry realizes something.

     “Wait…” Harry questioned.

Zayn looks at him.

     “I'm not a kid. Why did you call me that?”

Zayn tried to stifle his laughter. “Well because I'm seventeen and you turned what a three months ago?”

Harry scoffed. “You’re just a year older, big whup.”

The tea kettle went off. Harry removed it from the heat while Zayn got out two mugs. They both went to sit on the couch with tea in hand.

     “By the way, where are your parents?” Harry asked before he sipped his tea.

Zayn took a bite out of one of the biscuits. “Dad’s out of town working and My mum and sisters are taking a trip.” He grabs his tea in one hand and put the other arm across the couch. Harry bit one of the biscuits.

Harry furrowed his eyebrows. “So they leave you alone? That’s odd.”

Zayn shrugs. “Guess so. But they trust me enough. I don’t do much anyways.”

Harry frowns. Zayn must be alone a lot. Maybe he was okay with it. Harry was alone too. Zayn probably didn’t feel lonely though.

Zayn grabbed Harry’s wrist. “Hey, it’s okay. I might be alone, but I got to meet the prince, hmm?” He then put an arm around Harry. “And the prince is better than anyone could guess.”

Harry then rested his head over Zayn’s.

     “I was alone” Harry whispered.

Zayn hummed. “But it’s okay now. I'm here with you.” He comforted.

     “Still….” Harry mindlessly continued.

It was three months full of emotions. For a whole week Harry looked at old pictures of Des. There was one where Des and him sneaked out of the castle when Anne was busy. They went to a freak show circus. He remembers what he said when they arrived. “Alright, boy. Your mother didn’t want me to bring you here because she’s worried I might scare yah. So when we come back say that we at the mall or something. Got it?” And when they got home Anne had a fake smile. “Where were you guys?” “At the mall or something.” harry said.

Zayn got up quickly and got them a huge blanket. Harry’s eyes widen at the sudden movement. He wrapped it around Harry and himself.

     “Wanna talk about it?” He asked.

Harry’s eyes started to tear. Zayn wrapped his arms around Harry.

     “It’s okay, cry it out.” Zayn told him.

Harry then started sobbing.

     “Oh it was horrible. My mum told the workers to stay home and it was so lonely. Norma wasn’t there to give me her daily stories of someone cutting her through traffic. She wasn’t there to comfort me. Mum was putting herself alone. Maybe she needed to be but I didn’t. That’s actually the reason why I fought with my dad. And I killed him….” Harry sobbed.

Zayn hugged him tighter.

     "It felt like there was no air to breath. Like he took it with him. Whenever I passed his office I felt more empty. And once a while I would forget and go looking for him. I looked upstairs and the kitchen and the entertainment room but I wouldn’t find him. Then I passed his office and looked in. Once I saw his coat on the hanger from that night, It all came back. Me yelling, him trying to prove a point, me not listening. I said Being the prince is the worst. And I saw it. I saw his heart chatter into pieces. I was too drunk to realize why that broke him. But I know. He told me he always wanted a boy to carry on the name. I was his best achievement. And when I said I hated it, His heart broke. Then he….he stopped breathing. I did CPR over ten times. And he never woke up. And the worst part is that I still am waiting for him to wake up. I still believe deep down he is still alive. Even when I saw his lifeless body getting buried. Even when I saw my Mum became a widow...I still do.”

Zayn let Harry rest his head on his shoulder. Harry poured out his emotions. All three months Harry never showed anyone how weak he felt. He never realized how much Des was part of his life. Even though Des never let him out he was still a great dad. Harry replays the day every time he’s about to sleep. It still doesn’t connect to him. Des and Harry were arguing and then Des passed out. It was a flip of a switch. From angry to panic. Harry had ignored his mother for a while. That also didn’t make sense. She was his only parent left.

     “Hey,” Zayn whispered.

Harry looked up. His eyelashes were clumped from the tears and his breathing was coming in short intakes.

     “Do you feel better? I’ll always be here.” Zayn stated.

Harry gave a small smile. “A bit better." Harry looked at Zayn’s shirt. There was a huge wet spot. “Sorry ‘bout that.” Harry chuckled rubbing Zayn’s shirt.

Zayn shook his head. “It’s okay.”

Zayn searched Harry’s eyes. Harry did not dare to look away. All the air in his lungs disappeared. Harry sat upright to Zayn slowly. Zayn breathed through his mouth a little. Zayn leaned in a bit initiating a kiss. Harry was magnetized to him for some reason. Harry laid his hand on his thigh. Zayn wiped Harry’s tears away with his thumb. Harry put his other arm between Zayn’s right one. He raised an eyebrow in question. Harry leaned fully, brushing his lips against Zayn’s. Zayn then began kissing Harry passionately. Harry moaned in Zayn’s mouth. He bit Zayn’s bottom lip making him moan. Harry had no idea what he was doing but it felt right. Zayn then opened Harry’s mouth with his tongue. This was way better than Harry thought it would. They swirled their tongues over each other. Harry then sucked in Zayn’s bottom lip. They eyed each other. Harry continued sucking Zayn’s bottom lip.

     “Is this good?” Harry asked.

Zayn smiled. “You’re doing great babe.” He looked at Harry’s neck, brushing his fingers against it. Harry shivered. “May I?” Zayn asked.

Harry shivered again. He never has done anything of this sort and it all seemed exciting. He nodded. Zayn wanted to be sweet and slow. Zayn leaned to Harry’s neck slowly and breathed hotly. Little licks to Harry’s neck started it off. Harry liked the foreign feeling. He flatly licked his necked. He sucked the neck harshly, speeding up. Harry moaned. Zayn then intertwined their hands and put them above Harry’s shoulder.

     “Oh god, this is so good.” Harry admitted.

Zayn looked up and smiled. “How do you want it?”

Harry blushed. “Um, can you like, put more pressure?”

Zayn pecked Harry’s lips. “No need to be embarrassed. I can do that.”

Suddenly Zayn sucked hard on the same spot as before. Harry moaned and subconsciously rocked his hips forward.

     “Zayn, ugh, keep going.”

Zayn then purposely made slurping noises knowing that it’ll drive him insane.

     “Oh god, you’re so good at this.” Harry admitted.

Zayn leaned back to admire his work. There was a dark purple spot on the side of Harry’s neck.

     “Thank you. I’ve had practice.” Zayn put his index finger on his own lip. “Oh you’re going to have that bruise for a week at least.”

Harry laughed. “It’s not a bruise, it a love bite."

     “Tomato, tomatoe” Zayn remarked.

Harry looked at Zayn’s neck. “Can I return the favor?”

Zayn exhaled. “Oh, that sounds great."

Harry sighed relief. Harry pushed Zayn off his lap and crawled onto Zayn’s. He turned his head different angles finding the most comfortable one. Then he licked flatly on the skin between Zayn’s neck and collarbone. Then he suckled on the skin. He breathed in Zayn’s cigarette-and-cinnamon scent. He breathed cool air on the wet spot. Zayn moaned. Harry smiled to himself and continued sucking on the pale skin. He swirled his tongue against the sensitive skin. Out of reflex Zayn grabbed Harry’s curls. The sudden pull encouraged him. He suckled for a second and bit the skin slightly.

     “Oh christ, Harry.” Zayn moaned. Zayn’s moan went straight to Harry’s abdomen. Harry rolled his hips down to Zayn’s groin and bit harshly at his neck. Zayn panted. “Jesus, Harry. Where did that come from?”

Harry froze and blushed. “Um, I don’t know, instinct?”

Zayn caressed Harry’s face turning his chin up. “Did I make you insecure? I didn’t mean to. You are doing so well.”

Harry wanted to cuddle into Zayn. Wanted to hide away forever from the sadness that is the world. Instead he smiled. Then Zayn’s phone buzzed. Zayn’s face fell a bit and Harry’s chest ached.

     “Go ahead. I’ll be here.” Harry encouraged.

Zayn smiled and got out of the blanket fortress. As he walked to the mini kitchen Harry’s grin grew wider. Zayn was the greatest friend. Or lover. Or whatever they were. Harry wrapped the blankets around his shoulder and looked at Zayn. He leaned against the counter tracing his fingers in a pattern. He then laughed and Harry smiled to himself. Harry put his feet on the couch and continued watching. Zayn turned his head and catched Harry looking. Harry felt the blush rise on his face and burrowed his head. Stupid, stupid Harry thought. You can’t just stare at someone, you weirdo Harry cursed to himself. He then felt Zayn tapping his blanket covered body. Harry slowly raised his head.

     “Hey, my friend invited me out. Want to come with me?” Zayn said after smiling at Harry’s nine-year-old behavior.

Harry mumbled to himself. Is he dragging this on? Should he even call their relationship anything more than platonic? Is he making this harder for himself?

Zayn’s face fell. He crouched down to Harry’s eye level.

     “Hey, we can also stay here. It was just a suggestion.” Zayn explained sweetly.

     “Yeah, I’ll like that.” Harry agreed starting to gather up the blankets.

Harry has been over thinking way too much. He needs to calm down and just forget about everything and just let things be. Zayn has noticed his silence.

     “Are you okay?” Zayn asks.

Harry freezes. He looks at Zayn. He can see in the panic and question in his eyes.

     “Well-I-we..” Harry stumbles. He breathes in deeply then restarts his sentence. “I just want to- I’ve been wondering- what are we?”

It’s Zayn’s turn to be stumbling. He awkwardly runs his hands through his hair. And for the first time, Harry has seen Zayn lose his composure. He wants to cuddle him and make everything okay but he really needs his answer.

     “I really think it’s up to you. You never had an official boyfriend- or anything. I just don’t want to be a horrible example of a boyfriend..” Zayn says, close to the sound of crying. Harry thinks it because he’s afraid of being rejected.

Harry sits on the couch, slumping over. He really wanted Zayn to make the decision. Harry has always made the wrong decision. His dad’s death is the evidence for it.

     “We...we kissed before. Does that make it official? Or can I-” Harry gets a lump in his throat.

     “Just because we kissed does not mean we are bound together. We don’t have to be a thing.” Zayn explained. He can tell what Harry’s about to say.

     “I really liked our time together,” Harry explains awkwardly smiling, “but I- we would be better off friends.”

Zayn slowly nodded his head. He wrapped his arms around himself.

     “I understand. You’re a great kid, Harry.” Zayn replied.

Harry smiled before groaning. He lied his back onto the couch, rubbing his face. “Ugh, ‘I'm not a kid.”

     “Yes you are.” Zayn said jokingly.

Harry kicked his leg to Zayn playfully. Zayn tickled his side. Harry started bursting out giggling like a teenage girl. Zayn continued without remorse. Harry started squirming, crying and laughing.

     “St-stop. Stooop.” Harry giggled pleading surrender.

     "Never. Not unless you say you’re a kid.” Zayn offered.

     “I'm,” Harry giggled “I am not a kid.”

     “Wrong answer.” Zayn said as he tickled more.

Harry continued laughing. Zayn tickled his ribs, underarms, and stomach. Harry seriously could not breathe. He tried. He just lost even more air.

     “I can’t- I can’t breathe. I can’t breathe.” Harry proclaimed. His stomach started hurting from all the laughing.

     “Give up?” Zayn smirked.

     “I give up. I'm a kid.” Harry giggled. He really needed to breathe god dammit.

Zayn, being satisfied, stopped and smiled at his victory. Harry then tried to get his breathing under control. Even after he regains his breath he still has a smile on his face. Zayn smiled back. Harry didn’t notice the atmosphere has been lifted so quickly. It seems like back at his house he would forever be crying over his dad’s death.

     “Who invited you?” Harry scratched his hair.

Zayn puts his hands in his lap. “My friend, Liam.” he then tilted his head, “Why? Wanna come?”

Harry nodded to him. “Yeah, if I can get out of the castle might as well make the best of it.”

Zayn quickly got up. Harry stayed in his position furrowing his eyebrows together. Zayn then grabbed Harry’s wrist and left the apartment abandoning the tea and biscuits.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ((Next chapter coming soon))


	5. Tension and Explainations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait. Enjoy reading!

The next thing Harry knows he is riding in a car with Zayn to God knows where. Harry looks to Zayn for the tenth time and stares.

Zayn sighs. “What is it, Harry?”

Harry lowers the volume of the car radio. He turns his body to Zayn.

     “Where the hell are we going?”

They reach a stop light and Zayn turns to Harry.

     “We are going to my friend’s house. He is the one who invited us out. Remeber?”

Harry sighs dramatically.

     “Yeah.” He mumbles.

How many friends does Zayn have? Do regular people have a handful of friends or does he have a lot? Suddenly Harry’s heart drops. ~~They pull up to a very nice house~~ ~~not as nice as his castle of course but he knows a good house when he sees one.~~

     “Who is your friend?” Harry asks as he unbuckles his seat belt.

Zayn rolls his eyes and gets out of the car. Harry gets up as well with his eyes squinted. They both walk up to the door and Zayn rings the doorbell.

     “How rude, Malik. I was just asking a question, no need to not give an answer.” Harry huff crossing his arms.

The door opens and Harry snaps his head to it.

     “Zaynie!” The man exclaims. He goes to hug the crap out of Zayn. Zayn tries not to but he smiles anyway.

Zayn turns to Harry. “Harry, this is Liam. Liam, this is Harry.”

Liam’s eyes widen. “Harry? Like, prince Harry?”

Harry’s face flushes. “Um, yeah like that. Nice to meet you Liam.” He replies offering his hand to shake with.

Liam one arm hugs Harry, catching him in surprise. “You too, mate.” He gets out of the way of the door and waves his arm inside his house. “Make yourself comfortable.”

When they enter the house Harry sees that Liam has crisp white decor and black leather couches. Liam looks-wise is not that bad. He has that carpenter build, round face, thick shaven beard, and a face that says “warm & friendly”. He has his hair swooped to the side and is wearing a unbuttoned button up and skin tight jeans.

Harry sits himself down on the couch while Zayn and Liam go into the kitchen.

     “You guys don’t look ready for the club.” Liam casually states.

Harry turns to Zayn and Zayn’s shoulders tighten.

     “ _Where?_ ” Harry asks Zayn flustered. He just stands like a doe so Harry turns to Liam.

     "You didn’t tell him?” Liam asks Zayn. He still doesn’t reply. Liam sighs. “We  _were_  going to a pub but if you aren’t up for that then we can stay here.”

Harry frowns. Liam looks like he spent forever dressing and looked  _so_  good. He would feel bad the whole night if they didn’t go out. Harry gets up from the couch to walk over to the kitchen. “I feel like going to the pub.” Liam’s face lights up. Harry smiles, “So...how can I get ready?”

     “Are you sure you want to go out?” Zayn spits out quickly.

Harry wraps one arm around Zayn. “Don’t worry, I actually do want to go out tonight.” When he turns to Liam to ask if he can borrow clothes but Liam’s eyes is burning a hole on his arm on Zayn. Self-consciously, Harry moves his arm and decides to keep his hands to himself.

Zayn then relaxes. “Alright then. Payno, can we borrow some clothes?”

     “Of course, Zaynie.” Liam points to a hallway. “Go down that way, third door to the left.”

Harry nods his head and leads Zayn and his way to the bedroom. Would he even fit into the clothes? Why doesn’t he think things through? The room was messy as fuck. Clothes were thrown everywhere, bed sheets all drooping off the bed, and unfinished food on counters. Harry looks to Zayn horrified. He laughs undazed by the room’s condition.

     “Different from the living space huh?” Zayn chuckles. “Liam is a straight up pig if he doesn’t keep in mind to clean.”

Harry nods. He picks up a button up and shows it to Zayn. “Would this fit? Would  _any_ of this fit?”

Zayn shrugs. He picks up a plain white tee and a plaid shirt. He changes right in his spot. It looked like it fit pretty nicely. Harry takes his shirt off to put on the one he picked up. It was loose but who could complain.

Harry sits down awkwardly not knowing what to do. Zayn eyes him.

     “That’s it? You’re ready?” Zayn asks

     “I haven’t been to a club so….” Harry blushes out of embarrassment. “Don’t know what to exactly go for.”

     “Go for, ‘I have self respect but I wanna get laid’.” Zayn replies blatantly.

Harry stays still. “Even if I don’t wanna get laid?”

Zayn says hums answering yes. Harry doesn’t want to sell himself though. He doesn’t want to spark any relationships and frankly doesn’t even want to go to a bloody club. This is all a bad idea he knows it. He crosses his legs and studies the floor. He’ll do it for Zayn and Liam but other than that he will leave in a heartbeat. Speaking of Zayn and Liam, why does he call him Zaynie? Harry thought that if he even attempted to give him a cute name he will be kicked in the nads.

Zayn grabs Harry up and out the room. Liam was combing his eyebrows when they arrive in the room. Liam looks at Zayn holding Harry’s hands. Harry doesn’t know why he senses a predatory vibe but he removes his hands out of Zayn’s.

     “Lads ready?” Liam asks after he gathers himself together. 

Zayn smiles at him. “Ready.” 

Harry smiles a little at the way Zayn and Liam smile at eachother. He reminds himself to ask if they had or have a thing later. 

~*~

After a hour of waiting in line they finally enter the club. Lights flash, the floor lights up, and it reeks of alcohol. Horrid music plays but everyone looks too drunk off their arse to even care. Liam leads them to the bar. Harry gets excited at the pretty colored drinks.

     “Three sex on the beach.” Liam orders. He then turns to Harry. His face drops, “Oh! I’m sorry. I forgot you can’t drink.”

Harry realizes it himself. He curses under his breath. “It’s fine. How old are you?”

     “18.”

     “Zayn can’t drink either then.” Harry points out.

     “Hey! Let Liam buy the drinks. He buys them, we drink them rebelliously.” Zayn defends.

The drinks arrive and Harry doesn’t care anymore. He takes one and chugs it down. People will probably report him underage drinking. Surprisingly no one has recognised him. He slams the shot onto the table.

     “Keep them going.” Harry asks Liam.

He knows this is going to be a long night.

~*~

He was right. Harry has downed seven pints and lost Zayn and Liam. Harry can’t walk straight anymore but he doesn’t give a single shit. He goes across the dance floor and heads to the bathroom. He makes people spill their drinks and they yell at him but he, to repeat again, doesn’t give a shit. As he walks up to the bathroom a girl comes up. She has a brunette pixie cut and a little black dress.

     “You okay?” She asks

     “To be honest,” Harry wipes his eyes and tries to focus on her face, “Not really.”

She frowns. “Sorry to hear that. Wanna talk ‘bout it?”

Harry smiles closing his eyes. “Yeah, but it’s not much.”

     “I don’t care. My friends bailed me and I always wanted to have small talk with you.”

     “Oh, right.” Harry rolls his eyes still smiling drunkenly. “I’m the prince.” The girl nods her head chuckling. “Keep forgetting.”

     “So what’s the problem?” The girls brings up.

     “Oh, I lost my friends, got way too drunk, don’t want to be at this club and my dad passed so…” Harry leans on the wall. “What isn’t wrong?”

She grabs his arm and her eyes are genuine. “That must be a lot to deal with.”

Harry shrugs sadly. “I guess but it could be worse.” He stands straighter. “What’s your name? Can I have your number?”

She brightens up. “Charon. And why do you need my number? Can’t you just look me up on your website?”

     “I’m thinking of shutting it down.”

Charon gets out a pen and paper out of her purse and writes her number. “Nice to meet you, Harry.” She kisses him on his cheek then walks away waving.

Harry kisses his hand and waves as well all the while blushing. He then remembers he needs to piss. He goes in and he bumps into someone.

     “Oops! Sorry! I thought this restroom was empty.” Harry apologises.

The other guy backs up and drops his phone. He and Harry go to pick it up making eye contact.

     “Hi. Um, I see you have my phone.” The guy replies awkwardly.

Harry whistles. “Boy, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes.”

The guy stiffens. “Excuse me?”

     “With your blue eyes, fringe, and skater look going.” Harry continues.

     “Please stop.” He says but Harry can see  _please keep going_ in his eyes. It could also just be the beer goggles taking over. He continues anyway.

     “You also have a nice light voice, strong arms, and sharp cheekbones.”

The guy blushes trying not to smile. He pushes Harry out of the way to leave. “I’m not into blokes with unbuttoned shirts.” He attempts trying to sound angry.

When Harry buttons his shirt and takes a piss he looks for Zayn and Liam. He spots them at the bar. Only if they were there before. When he is close he hears them arguing.

     “What does it matter to you?” Zayn spits.

Liam is holding his drink a little too hard. “It doesn’t,” Zayn scoffs in the middle of Liam’s sentence, “I just think he’s too old.”

Zayn laughs sarcastically. “Yeah he’s  _so_ old. Almost a year older is such an age gap.” He rolls his eyes.

     “Then who gave you that?” Liam asks pointing to Zayn’s love bite.

Harry stiffens. “Shit.”

Liam and Zayn turn to him. Zayn looks at Liam carefully. Liam looks at them both.

     " _Harry?_   _He_ gave you a love bite.” Liam doesn’t believe it. Zayn grabs his own wrist out of nervousness. “You said Harry was just a friend.”

     “We are,” Harry buds in to explain. “We decided to be friends after I...gave him...that.” He says looking at the direction of the love bite. The tension in the air is so thick it can be cut with a knife. “I didn’t mean to get in the way of you two.” He apologises.

     “We aren’t a thing.” barked Liam and Zayn.

Harry furrows his eyebrows. “Then why is it a problem?”

Liam and Zayn looks at each other with wide eyes. It seemed like it just dawned upon them.

Harry’s phone rings. He picks it up.

     “Hello?”

_“Hey, Harry, are you staying over at Zayn’s?”_

Harry calms down at the sound of his mother. “No, actually, I was about to leave.” He starts walking to the exit.

_“Oh, okay good. I just wanted to know.”_

     “Is everything okay, Mum? You sound uncertain.”

_“Everything’s okay but…”_

     “What is it, Mum?” Harry starts to panic

_“I should’ve told you sooner…”_

     “Mum, whatever it is I want to know.” He holds his phone tighter.

      _"Your Dad had a heart disease. I known since your birthday. Actually, I kinda knew before that but it wasn’t confirmed until then.”_

Harry stops on the side walk. He stares at the pavement and sits down. Anne and He share a moment of silence.

     “Is that why when I argued with him he had a heart attack? I caused his heart to beat so fast it stopped?”

Anne didn’t respond.

     “I’ll be home in 15 minutes tops. Love you, Mum, bye.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment and give kudos if you liked it. There is more chapters to come.


	6. What Did I Get Myself Into?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is! The new chapter! Before you read I have to warn you that some violence and homophobic slurs are going to be in this chapter.

Harry arrives home. He walks in showing no expression.

     “Harry I-I’m so sorry. I should’ve told you earlier.” Anne sounds as if she is close to tears. 

Harry, still with no emotion, comes to her. He grabs her arms and makes them wrap around him. He then kisses on top of her head.

      “It’s okay, Mum.” Harry hugs Anne. “I can’t _ungive_ him a heart attack. I’m sure Dad knows I didn’t mean what I said. I’m just glad I still have you.”

Anne nods and then signals Harry to the living space. They sit down and watch some crap telly.

 ~*~ six months later ~*~

 

Anne has been seeing a man. Harry has hung out with him only a handful of times and he has a bad feeling about him. Anne seems to claim that it is just the idea of having another man but Des as a father that is bothering him. Harry would shrug agreeing. Harry knows that is part of the reason why, but it’s something else too. Whatever-the-fuck-his-name is sweet to Anne but  he would sometimes lash out. Harry almost ran to dial 911 but Anne stopped him by grabbing his wrist. _“Don’t, Harry, we just were having an argument. He has a bad temper.”_ Harry complied and hung up the phone. If he didn’t study psychology he would’ve told her what he wanted. The words always circled around his head. _Domestic Abuse_. He always wants to beg her to dump his abusive arse. Harry just can’t do that when Anne hasn’t been happier ever since Des died.  

Harry grabs his pre-packed backpack and sneaks out the window. Anne has invited fuckface over again and he really doesn’t want to communicate with someone who has abused his mother. He swings his legs over the ledge, steps on a brick sticking out of the wall, lands on the piece of concrete that lines around the castle and shimmies around the castle with his back to the wall. Harry reaches Anne’s room. He overhears his mum and piece-of-shit talking.

      “No, Harry’s fine. I think his teen angst is just at a peak right now.” Anne laughs.

      “Logical. Good thing my daughter will be his roommate soon.”

 Roommate? _Daughter_? There’s bloody two of them? Harry peaks over the wall. They have their backs to where Harry is. He jumps into the balcony walks across and jumps over the other edge of the balcony and lands on a branch of a tree. Harry works his way down to the ground promising himself to deal with his house life later. He calls Zayn.

      “Mate, where are you?” Harry walks out into the pavement next to his castle.

      “Look to your left,” Harry turns his head and spots Zayn’s car, “There you go. Nice to see you, love.” Zayn hangs up the phone.

Harry runs to the car. He spots Liam in the passenger seat.

     “So I guess I’m third wheeling today.” Harry smirks.

Liam’s face turns red while Zayn laughs. Harry sits in the backseat and they start to move.

     “Sorry to disappoint, Harry but me and Liam aren’t dating.” Zayn tries to say nonchalantly but he stutters when he says _date._

     “Well, dating or not, I still feel like a third wheel in between all the sexual tension.” Harry adds whispering in Zayn’s ear so Liam can’t hear.

Zayn swats him away. Harry giggles while Liam furrows his eyebrows together in confusion.

     “Stay in the back seat, Kid.” Zayn jokingly demands to Harry.

Liam turns the radio music up to fill up the silence. Zayn reaches over and places his hand on Liam’s thigh. Harry leans back on his seat and smiles smugly. Liam smiles and his neck flushes.

     “Where are we going? If you don’t mind me asking.” Harry asks after a couple minutes of aimlessly driving.

     “Have you eaten yet? We were looking around for the new bakery.” Zayn turns to Harry when they reached a stoplight.

     “Nope. ‘M starving.”

     “Good.” Zayn nods.

When they arrive the bakery, Harry opens the door and a vanilla scent fills the air. All three go up to the counter and order their pastries. They then sit down at a booth.

Liam and Zayn give each other fond looks and hold hands under the table. If Harry wasn’t a die-hard romantic he would have thrown up at least 3 times by now. Their bond was sickening.

     “Okay, spill the beans. How long have you two been dating?” Harry puts his elbows on the table.

They both try to speak but it comes out all stuttery. Zayn is suddenly interested in the floor and Liam awkwardly scratches his head. 

     “Oh, come on guys! It has been months since I brought up why it was a problem for me to be er... _more than friends_ with Zayn if there wasn’t a thing between you two.”

Liam whispers. “Four months.”

Harry’s jaw drops. He then slowly smirks. He fucking knew it. Zayn turns to Harry with a distressed look.

     “Don’t tell anyone though.” Zayn begs. Harry then furrows his eyes in question. Zayn sighs. “We haven’t exactly came out to our parents or let anyone know we were dating.”

Harry nods. After that there was awkward silence. Harry looks down at his hands. It dawns upon him that he wasn’t exactly straight either. Would he have to come out? _What_ was he? Harry likes boys, he knew that. But was he just gay? How would Anne react? His mum never showed dislike to gays but what if he was wrong. Would he be shunned?

The waiter comes with their food and coffee. They give their thanks. Harry grabs his coffee and donut with shaky hands.

     “So how have you been?” Zayn asks breaking the silence.

Harry blows a raspberry. “Oh, man has it been hell.” Harry starts. “My mum has been dating again.”

Liam sucks in air with closed teeth. “How has that been?”

     “The dude’s a straight up dick.” Harry sips some coffee.

     “His name?” Zayn asks biting into his muffin.

Harry shrugs. “Don’t wanna learn his name. I usually call him fuckface.”

Zayn and Liam chuckle. Liam gestures for Harry to continue.

     “At first I was like ‘Yay, mum is going to find someone to make her happy’. I was excited to see who she meets. I knew any guy wouldn’t compare to my father but _this guy_ ,” Harry rolls his eyes and looks away, “He’s exactly like those arsehole step dads in films. He all so nice with the mum. They give them gifts, kisses their wrist, and try to get invested with their family. But once He talks to me he threatens me. ‘You better not get in the way of me and your mum’. And it turns out he has a daughter." 

Zayn chokes on his muffin. “He has a _daughter_?”

Harry raises his voice. “I know right? Now I have to deal with her.” Harry then goes quiet. “That isn’t the bad part though,” Liam and Zayn lean in, “I think he is a domestic abuser.”

Liam’s face turns angry while Zayn is in shock.

     “Are you serious?” Liam spits out.

Harry nods. “It only happened one time but it followed the abuse cycle. They started arguing about moving in together. Mum said they weren’t ready for that but he kept insisting. He then started bringing in his stuff, slowly moving in. Mum told me ‘We are just testing the waters to know how it would feel once he moves in together’ ; tensions building. Once he started to rearrange the furniture, that’s when it all happened. He and Mum were yelling at eachother. He started calling her names. ‘You prude, why are you so hard headed? You’ll let me sleep with you but moving in together is too much? You fucking slut. Is it commitment that you are afraid of?’ I heard my mum sob. Then I heard the slap. He _hit_ her.”

     “Oh my god. You should’ve called 911!” Zayn loudly whispers.

     “I almost did. I ran down stairs into the kitchen and grabbed the phone. My mum stopped me though. She said he apologised and didn’t mean to. I looked into her eyes begging to be understood. After that scene I guess I didn’t want to make it real. When they weren’t fighting she was happy. Purely happy. I guess I didn’t want to take that away from her.”

Liam was still angry. “That is the honeymoon phase, that part where they aren’t fighting. If it is truly domestic abuse it will happen again soon.”

Harry puts his head in his hands. He should’ve called 911. He needed to stop this. Was he getting caught up in the cycle too?

Zayn hugged Liam. Liam did seem to radiate flames.

     “You okay, babe?” Zayn asked, his lips pressed to his neck.

     “No.” Liam replied simply. He was choked up in tears.

Harry is now concerned. “What happened?”

Liam balls out crying. Zayn is there wiping the tears, hugging him. Harry sits across the table wanting to comfort him.

     “I was…” Liam clears his throat in attempt but the tears keep coming.

Zayn combs Liam’s hair with his fingers. He places his head on Liam’s shoulder. “It’s okay. Talk when you’re ready.”

Harry doesn’t know what to do. Does he go comfort Liam or? He may have improved his social skills but he still doesn’t know what’s acceptable sometimes.

     “My last relationship was like your mum’s.” Liam blurts out.

Harry’s heart drops. Liam has been in an abusive relationship? Harry turns to Zayn. His face was angry and sad at the same time.

     “She would tell me to man up. That I should stop acting like a girl.” Liam explained, angry tears running down his face. His face then was full of sorrow. He closed his eyes and sobbed.

     “It’s okay. Crying isn’t unmanly. It’s human,” Zayn hushed while Liam burrowed his face into Zayn, “You don’t have to go on if you want.”

When Liam calmed down he looked up at Zayn. Zayn smiled and kissed Liam. Harry faced another way. That kiss was way too intimate to be shared with anyone else but them two.

     “I don’t think that way, Liam. I’m glad you moved on from her because you deserve way better.”

     “Good thing I found you, huh?” Liam smiled again. It was the ‘clouds moving away from the sun’ beautiful.

Harry wished he someday ended up with a relationship like that. That kind of relationship is what movies should look like. No bullshit, just pure support and love.  

~*~ 4 months later ~*~

Harry is now 17. He spent it out with Liam and Zayn. Anne and What’s-His-Face hasn’t gotten into another fight...yet. It’s only a matter of time Harry knows.

_“No, I insist.” Harry pleaded._

_Anne pouted. “Harry, you can’t spend your birthday alone.”_

_“I won’t. I’ll be with Liam and Zayn,” Harry looked at the both of them, “You guys have plans already. Go, spend the night out. I’ll be fine.”_

He was. They had a netflix marathon. Despite been the third wheel, as always, he had a good time. Zayn and Liam tried to make the night about Harry. It warmed Harry’s heart at the notion. _I picked good friends_ Harry thought. They might of gotten popcorn everywhere and had a too long discussion if John and Sherlock would make a good couple.

What’s-His-Face won and now he lives in the castle. Harry has learned to deal with it by keeping out of his sight. Anne is also not so strict ever since she has been actually leaving the castle. Harry walks up to her in her bedroom.

     “Hey, Mum.” Harry greets nonchalantly.

“I’m guessing your friends are coming over again.” Anne predicts not even looking at Harry.

He stands up and pretends to throws confetti. “You are correct,” Harry says in a TV show presenter voice, “You have won the ultimate prize!”

Anne turns to him finally chuckling. “What’s my prize?”

Harry kisses Anne on the cheek and hugs her. “Your prize is my love.”

     “When are they coming?” Anne asks after she rolls her eyes.

Harry shrugs. “I don’t know, but soon.” He walks out of the room. “I’ll be in front waiting.” Harry informs her.

Zayn and Liam are getting out from the car when Harry is opening the front door. He waves at them.

     “Hey, mate, how are ya?” Zayn beams at Harry.

     “Okay, just bored.” Harry comes up and hugs him. He turns to Liam. “Nice to see you,” Harry waves them into the castle, “Come in. I’m going to whip up some tea.”

Harry heads to the kitchen and puts the kettle on. He grabs a plate and puts some cookies on it.

     “How’s the apartment?” Harry puts the plate on the coffee table.

Liam bites into a cookie. “Loo is still crap.”

Zayn laughs. “We called a plumber but he didn’t even know why when you flush the toilet, the things you flush come out of the shower head.”

Harry chokes on his cookie from laughing. “I would kill for a bathroom like that.”

     “Everyone would. We have such a great functioning bathroom ever.” Liam rolls his eyes laughing.

     “We are being sarcastic right?” Harry asks.

     “ _No_ , Harry, I totally love our shite small apartment that has sewage instead of running water for a shower.”

Zayn wraps one arm around Liam’s shoulders. “Of course you do, Liam.”

The kettle whistles signaling it’s ready. Harry goes to the kitchen and runs into Fuck-face.

     “Who are they?” He asks

Harry turns off the stove and grabs three tea cups. “My friends,” Harry turns to him, “They _have_ been here before. You know that right?”

     “I don’t care about your stupid friends. I was trying to make conversation.” He spits out while looking in the cupboard for food.

He pours the water into the three cups. He puts cream in Zayn’s and lemon in Liam’s. “Well, don’t make conversation because you feel like you have to. I don’t want to communicate with you either, man.”

He hears him snicker. “It’s Dennis, not _man_.”

     “Liam!” Harry shouts.

     “Yeah?” Liam shouts back. 

     “You like lemon with your tea right?” Harry asks.

     “I do, thank you.”

He then puts the tea bags into the cups and brings them to the coffee table in the living space. He is not voluntarily call his mum’s boyfriend by his actual name. Harry finds Liam lying across Zayn’s lap. He aw’s mockingly and Zayn flicks him off endearingly. Harry turns on the TV and they all drink tea in peace. After a while Liam falls asleep on Zayn. Harry nudges Zayn with his foot and points to Liam. Zayn looks at Liam sleeping. His face softened and his eyes were full of fond. Harry wanted to claw his eyes off at the sight. Harry gets off the couch.

     “I’m going to get a blanket, okay?” Harry informs Zayn.

Zayn waves his hands, shooing him off. Harry whispers _rude_ and Zayn laughs quietly. Harry goes upstairs. He goes down the hall and finds the closet full of extra blankets. He picks the top one and goes back down.

     “ _What the fuck_!”

Harry stops in his tracks. That sounded like Dennis. Harry hears footsteps. His heart started to beat faster. He walks into the living space and sees a confused Zayn, a sleepy Liam, and a raged Dennis.

     “Wh-what’s happening? Why are we shouting?” Liam rubs his eyes as he starts waking up.

Dennis turns to Harry. “Your friends are gay?”

Harry turns to Liam and Zayn. All panic sets in them. Zayn and Liam’s eyes go wide.

     “I caught this faggot,” He points to Zayn, “Kissing this faggot’s neck.” He says pointing to Liam. 

Harry throws the blanket to Liam. “Now, _hold up one second_.” He raises his voice. He never does unless someone is pissing him off.

Dennis scrunches his face in disgust. “You two are nasty.” He spits out. Zayn and Liam’s faces frown. “Your type of lifestyle is why AIDS are a thing. You guys should be ashamed.”

Harry balls up his fists. “You have no right to talk to my friends like that.”

Dennis snaps his neck in Harry’s direction. “I have the right to do whatever,” He turns to Harry and pushes him to the wall, “The fuck I want.”

Harry hisses as his back makes impact with the wall. Zayn stands up from the couch and Liam hides behind him.

     "Hey, that’s child abuse!” Zayn shouts.

Dennis comes up to Zayn and kicks him. Zayn drops to the floor with a thud. He then repeatedly kicks him in the stomach

     “Zayn!” Liam cries across the room.

     “Don’t make me hurt you too, faggot.” Dennis threatens.

Everyone tenses more when Anne is heard going down the stairs.

Dennis grabs Liam by the collar. “Leave right now.” He commands with a low dark voice. Liam picks up Zayn and goes out the door. “Don’t come back either.”

Harry attempts to stand but he cries out in pain. Dennis hurries to him and places him on the couch.

     “Sorry, about that. I didn’t mean to hurt you too.” Dennis apologizes.

Anne walks into the room. “Did I hear something?”

Dennis stares at Harry with harsh eyes. Harry has never been so terrified in his life.

     “Um..” Harry starts. Dennis nods at him slowly. “Zayn and Liam just left. Everything is okay.”

Anne tilts her head not buying it. She looks at Dennis. He smiles at her reassuringly.

     “Okay then.” Anne smiles and goes back to her room.

_What did I get myself into?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ((Would you guys like if I wrote Harry liking girl's clothing? Answer in the comments))


	7. I want Dennis to go away as much as you do.

Harry runs to the bathroom. With his back to the door, he calms his breathing. He looks at his hands and finds them shaking. He is getting trapped into the bullshit dynamic that is his step father. Harry's reflection of the bathroom mirror resembled nothing of what he defines himself. He usually saw a young man who had two friends, loving mother, and someone trying out new things everyday. Now all that remains is a little boy who is terrified of being beaten. A boy who now questions how much his worth is. If the tender innocent love between his two friends deserves being beaten and harassment then what does Harry deserve? If the thought of kissing other boys crosses Harry's mind more than Dennis' liking does he deserve being kicked out of the castle? Harry fishes his phone out of his pocket and calls Liam.

     "Is he okay? Please tell me Zayn's okay." Harry rushes out once the call has been received.

     "Not really," Liam starts, "Zayn is severely bruised."

Harry can hear the tears Liam is fighting back. His heart throbs. He really wants to be there right now but he is too afraid of Dennis to leave.

     "But he is _going_  to be okay right?" Harry bites his nail. He never planned that Dennis would lash out at them. He hears bed sheets rustling.

     "Yeah, he's going to be okay." Liam answers.

Harry hears Liam whispering  _I_ _t's Harry, babe, wanna talk to him?_  over the phone.

     "Hazza, how are you?" Zayn asks with a weak voice.

Harry let's out a breath he didn't know he was holding. Although Zayn sounded weak at least he is still alive. More importantly, Zayn still wanted to talk to Harry. "Malik! Oh my go- I'm so sorry for what happened. I knew he was a dick but I didn't know he would have a problem with you guys too. I should've done something. Anything. But my back hurt so bad and I blacked out. I should've gone with you." Harry rushes out in one breath.

Zayn laughs. "It's okay, Hazz. I swear. And I wouldn't want to put you in danger too so it was a good idea to have stayed at home, yeah?"

Harry hums agreeing. God, how lucky has he been to pick out such great friends? I'm pretty sure most people would of broken off the friendship if they were beaten by their friend's parent.

     "I shouldn't have kissed Liam anyway. Dennis is a twat to women so he would obviously a dick to queers." Zayn adds.

Harry hears the castle's door bell ring. "Hold on a second." Harry says into the phone. He exits the bathroom and peers down the hall.

     "Welcome home, honey!" Dennis cheers.

     "Hey, Dad." A mature feminine voice speaks flatly.

Today is full of surprises then. First Dennis lashes out at him and his friends now he is forced to live with his daughter. Just. Great.

     "Ugh, his daughter is here." He says into the phone. Harry walks back into the bathroom. He is not dealing with that yet.

Liam snatches the phone. "Oo! How is she?"

     "You seem awfully excited to know about the daughter of the man who fucking beat you up nearly an hour ago." Harry makes sure Liam can _hear_ the frown on Harry's face.

     "Hey, I'm just hoping she isn't an arse like her father." Harry can picture Liam's pout.

     "Let's hope you're right. She's lucky too. She got away from him." Harry knows he needs to leave soon but he unrealistically plans how to live off of pizza that could be delivered through the bathroom window.

     " _Harry come meet your new roommate_!" Dennis hollers.

     "Talk to you guys later. I have to go now." Harry flushes the toilet to play as if he was actually using the bathroom. If he fooled anyone, they must think he is concipated.

     "Bye, Harry." Zayn and Liam say in unison.

Harry hangs up the phone and keeps walking down the hall. She might not be bad. She probably dodged all of Dennis' shite parenting. Harry stops in his track and realizes his state. He is still in pajamas. Should he change? He was comfortable but maybe she pictured the prince differently. Did she enjoy the castle? She must be stoked about that right? Harry decides not to change because if she is going to share a room with him she might as well get used to him in pj's all day. He spot Dennis. He puts his hands in his pockets and scrunches his face together.

     "Hurry up with it, Dennis."

Dennis is caught off guard and his fake smile turns sour. He stands straight and motions his hand to his daughter. "This is Gemma." Dennis turns to Gemma smiling. "Gemma, this is Harry."

     "Hey, nice to meet you, Harry." Gemma puts her hand out, genuinely smiling.

Harry gives up his mad state and a smile creeps on his face. He shakes Gemma's hand. "You too. Hope you find the castle comfortable, Gemma." Harry picks up the luggage besides her legs. "Come along, I'll show you our room." Harry says friendly.

"No, Harry, it's okay. I'll get the servants to take her luggage." Dennis grabs the bags from Harry's hands.

Harry awkwardly keeps his hands in the air. He twists his eyebrows in confusion. "Um, only my family could command the servants."

Dennis grips the bags tighter. Harry can tell he upset him. He flinches and stands closer to Gemma. "We are family, no?" Dennis asks. Harry looks at Gemma. She frowns. Harry would've certainly said  _Never will I consider you family_  but after what happened earlier he can't muster up the courage to ever talk back to Dennis. Dennis snaps back to his fake smile. "Good, now show Gemma the room and I'll get the servants." Dennis walks away.

Harry stays in place. Gemma rolls her eyes and drags him by the wrist. Harry let's her move him. She brings them into a empty room. Her brown hair whips around to face him, crossing her arms.

     "What?" Harry asks.

     "I know my dad is a dick." Gemma states in a mad voice.

Harry furrows his eyebrows. Why did she state the obvious? Why did she drag him away instead of asking where their room is?

Gemma sighs. "I just wanted to get this out of the way cos' I hate small talk. I'm 25. I know my dad is a dick and am surprised he got another girlfriend, especially your mum who is _the motherfucking queen_. I used to live with my mum but he scared her into giving her custody to him. My mum divorced his ass after years of abuse. I graduated college but I don't have a house so I have nowhere else to go."

Harry stares blankly for a second then sits on the ground. That was a overload of information. Gemma sits on the floor across him. He looks into her eyes.

"Wow." He says simply.

Gemma nods her head. Her face then droops. "I also can tell he is starting to abuse you guys."

Harry's eyes go wide. "How can you tell? Was it because I gave him the power of the servants?"

     "It wasn't that, but damn I should've caught that." Gemma jokes. Harry doesn't laugh along. She clears her throat. "I knew because I was part of this before. Like I told you, he abused my mum for years. The air is heavy. Dennis seems like a giant and you doubt your every move. I was lucky to have escaped. But he always comes back to control you."

Harry's eyes stings. So he can't get away now. He and his mum will forever be under Dennis' control. Harry tries to smile away the tears. Gemma grabs Harry's hands. He looks into her green eyes filled with sorry. Harry shakes his head. He can't cry. Gemma rubs her thumb across his fingers and he loses it.

     "No, no it's okay. I'll be here, we can go through this together." Gemma hushes Harry.

Harry shakes his head. "I don't want it to happen again." Gemma tilts her head in question. "I don't want him to-to, you know." Harry pleads. Gemma shakes her head disagreeing. He makes a small noise. He doesn't want to say it. He can't bring himself to make this real.

     "Abuse you?" Gemma finishes his sentence.

Harry puts his head in his hands. He knows it is abuse. He does. But he doesn't want to put a name on it.

     "Harry, I know he only did it once but you have to acknowledge the problem in order to fight it." Gemma encourages him. She wipes his tears. "Harry, I want to help. I want Dennis to go away as much as you do. But we can't unless we think of how."

Harry tries to not make his lip wobble. "Like a plan? We're going to make a plan on how to get rid of him?" Harry asks. That's bizarre. She's making this like they're robbing a bank.

Gemma nods. She stands up and puts her hand out for Harry to take. "Later though. For now you have to show me my new room."


	8. Identities and Another Problem

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took 5 months! Here's a Christmas gift to make up for it.

Harry wakes up by getting kicked in the face. He winces and sits up. After he rubs his eyes he sees a sorry Gemma.

"Oh, I am so sorry," Gemma says sincerely, "I should've told you that I kick in my sleep."

Harry chuckles and waves his hand signaling it's okay. He stands from the bed and stretches his back. Since Anne nor Harry knew Gemma was coming so soon they didn't get another bed. After he showed her his (well, their) bedroom, Gemma said she was okay with sleeping on the floor.

_"Don't be ridiculous," Harry said rolling his eyes, "You could share the bed with me."_

_Gemma was putting her stuff in a drawer. "No it's fine. I can wait until we get another bed."_

_Harry's face became serious. "Gemma, really, I'm okay with sharing. If you want to share a bed with me I'm okay with it." Harry started folding blankets so he doesn't have to look at Gemma. "I also haven't been able to sleep alone...I usually talk to my friends until I pass out."_

_Gemma closed the drawer she was filling. She put her arms out, "Do you need a hug?" Harry slowly comes to hug her. Gemma puts her head on his. "I'll share a bed with you if you need it."_

Gemma pulled her hair into a bun. "I'm going to check if Dennis is at the kitchen, kid." Harry's face resembled an angry kitten. Gemma threw a pillow at him. "Harry, you will always be younger than me, so I'll call you kid. Get used to it."

Harry stuck his tongue out. He was most definitely not an immature kid.

After a while Gemma peeks into the room. Harry looks at her in question.

"Kitchen is clear." Gemma says in a deep voice.

Harry laughs. "Is the culprit anywhere in sight?" He says playing along.

"It seems that the culprit is at the grocery store. We have 20 minutes to investigate and leave."

Harry walks out of the room with his finger cocked imitating a gun. Gemma copies Harry and leads the way. She checks the hallway behind her shoulder. "Coast clear." Harry checks the stairs. He walks down the stairs and Gemma follows. Gemma puts her arm out to stop Harry. "I'll put out milk and eggs and you come in, got it?" Harry nods. Soon Harry walks into the kitchen. Gemma is cooking scrambled eggs.

"I can make pancakes if you want." Harry suggests. She smiles and nods. Harry gets out the pancake mix and pours milk into it. Harry turns on another burner and gets out a pan. When he is at his third pancake Gemma is done with the eggs. She pulls out two plates, plops a pancake on and some eggs.  
Harry runs out of batter and turns off the burner. He picks a pancake and some eggs. He sits across from Gemma on the dinner table. They eat in silence for a while. It's not an awkward silence though, it's comfortable. Harry doesn't feel that a lot. How could he feel so comfortable with Gemma after just a day? He doesn't even know a lot about her. Should he ask more about her? Or should he just wait it out and learn about her along the way?

"Something eating at you, Harry?" Gemma says breaking the silence.

Harry looks at her surprised. How did she know that? "Um, yeah...um, What did you study in college?"

Gemma laughs hard. Like clutching her stomach hard. Harry chuckles awkwardly. "Oh my god I thought it was something more serious." Gemma says wiping away a tear. "Your face was so stressed."

So that is how she knew. Did he always have an expressive face? He needs to work on that, Harry notes.

"Anyways, I studied social media and physiology." Gemma replies biting a piece of pancake. "Now, are you done with school?" Gemma asks after she swallows her food.

"Yeah," Harry drinks milk, "When I was 14. Then I studied a couple of things." Gemma's jaw drops. He laughs expecting the reaction.

"Amazing, kid. Are you going to use what you studied or are you being the next King?"

Harry shrugs. His mum and him never discussed it although he did study about the government. He never thought about if he would even like to be the next King. He didn't even know if it was a choice. He thinks he would make a good one if he had to. Harry picks up his dishes and rinses them in the sink.

As he washes his dishes he sees Gemma smile to herself and comes toward him. Gemma hauls herself to sit on the counter. She stares at Harry until he gets the hint. He sighs, "Yes, Gemma?"

"So I was wondering, would you like to go out?"

Harry stops his movement. "What?!" Harry says with surprise.

Gemma scoffs, hitting Harry lightly on the shoulder. "Not like that you idiot," Gemma says laughing at the end, "I mean we should go somewhere. Before Dennis gets here."

Harry laughs with relief. "My mom is awake and we should tell her at least." He sees Gemma is disappointed. "Where would we go anyways?"

"The park, the mall, hell, even the gas station sounds good. Let's just leave and forget about Dennis. And I doubt you haven't ran away before."

Harry coughs awkwardly. He has but he won't tell her that. He also won't tell her that his mom never seemed to notice when he's gone too. Gemma puts away the dishes for him. She looks at him anticipating. _C'mon_ Harry hears. He smiles, "Fine, let's just leave." Gemma jumps with excitement.

"Good, now tell me how you leave this castle because I see Dennis driving in." Gemma says quickly, bolting up the stairs.

Harry panics. He runs after her but soon leads the way. They enter their room and Harry steps out the window. "Follow my lead." Gemma and him go around the ledge, jump across Harry's mom's room, and slides down the tree. By the time they are catching their breaths, Harry can hear Dennis opening the front door. He drops to the ground because his adrenaline has disappeared. Gemma lies down with him and giggles.

"See? I have great ideas!" Gemma says.

"If I don't breathe regularly in five minutes I blame you." Harry jokes.

Gemma gets up and pulls Harry to his feet. She points to the mall a few blocks away and starts walking. Harry rolls his eyes.

~*~

They reach the mall and realize they didn't bring money. Harry groans while Gemma laughs.

"What do we do now? Just browse?"

"Yeah exactly. I told you we just needed to get out."

"Aren't we just loitering?" Harry adds sternly.

Gemma shrugs and goes in. "You coming or not?" Harry deeply sighs and goes in grudgingly.

Gemma attempts to get ice cream by making silly conversation with the customers. _Oh so, funny story, we were running away from our abusive dad- well, his mom's boyfriend- and we forgot money. How about you share some of that ice cream?_ Apparently the public isn't as nice anymore as most people just said _Too bad_ or _Piss off._ Harry admires her effort though. They both just end up next to the playground for little kids. Luckily someone left a quarter in a gumball machine so they get a crappy piece of gum at least.

~*~

"What if they aren't as smart as us?" Gemma adds to their discussion about aliens. She is leaning on the gumball machine, next to other candy machines, looking at the escalators move.

"Possibly, but smart as in, you know, they have some civilization." Harry is lying on the bench next to the candy machines, one arm across his chest and other limp on the floor.

"What if they are just single called organisms? Would you still call that aliens?" Gemma turns her head to Harry.

Harry hums thinking. "Most people say aliens are animal-like but I don't know."

"Sorry to interrupt but I have something to add."

Gemma and Harry turn to the voice and it's a boy. He turns his quarter in the skittles machine nonchalantly. He has a messy Afro and circle glasses. He wears a baggy shirt, semi-fitting pants, and beat up chucks.

Harry clears his throat. "Um, sure. It's not like we're bored out of our mind."

The guy laughs. Harry decides he has a nice voice. "Well, by definition alien is belonging to a foreign country. Obviously that is toward to immigrants. But it could also mean a hypothetical being from another world."

Harry leans on one arm. "Is that not proving my point?"

The guy chews on a couple skittles. "Sorry," he says flushing, downing his skittles, "That was not my point. What I was going at was that by definition it is non specific. So aliens could be just single cells or even civilizations."

Harry looks at the guy's eyes for a while. Beautiful brown. Wait what, no Harry is being distracted. He looks at Gemma. She has a huge grin on her face.

"I like this smart fella." Gemma adds chuckling.

The guy chuckles. He scratches his hair. "My name's Nicole. Um, I don't know if you know anything about this but I'm agender. So I'd rather you say my name. My pronouns are they/them/their. Whatever you prefer."

Gemma and Harry act like deer in headlights. Harry is stunned. He wants to ask questions but that is probably rude. "Um, yeah I don't understand."

Nicole's eyes light up. They goes to sit across from Harry, making him sit up and move backwards. "Oo, alright. I'll explain but remember not everyone likes explaining. Actually a lot of people find it exhausting and don't want to. But I'll put it simply. Agender is identifying as having no gender. For me I don't feel like I belong to any gender, therefore I identify as agender. As for my pronouns, they/them/their are gender neutral so I use them because they don't have masculine or feminine connotations. But remember, pronouns and gender don't always match. It's just a way to express yourself, just like dressing in typical masculine or feminine clothes. Did I lose you there?"

Harry blinks. "You did, but I'll learn. No worry."

Nicole smiles. They literally beam out sunshine. Harry notes to never kill their happiness ever. The way one strand of their hair droops in front of their face and their smile radiates joy. Nicole's eyes and skin are the deepest shade of smooth brown. Harry slowly releases a moan without thinking.

"Harry, we have a call," Gemma says breaking the staring contest of Nicole and Harry, "You don't mind right, Nicole?" Nicole shakes their head. Gemma grabs Harry's wrist and drags him down the hall.

"Is it mom?" Harry asks.

Gemma rolls her eyes. "No, no one's calling. I just want to discuss about you and Nicole."

"What about it?" Harry furrows his eyebrows

"Harry, I don't want to assume but you are hitting on Nicole." Gemma crosses her arms.

Harry blushes. "What makes you say that?"

"You're looking at...them with obvious heart eyes. It's disgusting."

"No, I just like them as a friend. Aren't they interesting?" Harry lies. The last time something like this happened Zayn got pummeled. People can't always just confess their love (or in this case, crush) because others won't approve. Gemma's body language softened. Her face went limp, her arms twist together and she lowers her voice.

"Harry, it's okay to like other genders but girls. It's even okay _not_ to like girls. I don't know who taught you different but they are wrong." Gemma grabs Harry's left hand and looks him in the eye. "There isn't a single thing wrong with how you feel. Even if people don't accept you, others will. _I_ will. Remember that, okay?"

Harry's lips quiver. His eyes water. Harry didn't think things would be so emotional. He feels so relieved for some reason. He feels like he just heard everything he needed. He smiles at Gemma and starts softly crying. Harry makes Gemma hug him and he sobs into her sweater. He tries not to be loud but he can't help it. Happiness washes over him.

"Thank you. This has been bothering me for some time now." Harry smiles. Gemma nods her head.

They walk back to Nicole. Nicole is just playing on their netindo. They smile at Gemma and Harry. "Is everything good?" Nicole asks putting their netindo in their backpack. Harry nods. “Goodie! Okay, so, do you want to continue about aliens or go buy somethings?”

“Sorry, Nicole, I didn't bring any money.” Harry informs. Gemma and him really should've thought the “escape” plan better.

Nicole shakes their head smiling. “I can buy the things,” they see Harry start to speak but they hold one fingering the air to stop him, “it's on me.”

Harry turns to Gemma as to ask for her opinion. She shrugs, agreeing. “How about we shop and continue our discussion?” Nicole's face lights up. They nod vigorously and puts on their backpack. Nicole leads the away from the kid’s playground.

~*~

They all enter a shop and Nicole tells them to look around. _“If you like something, tell me to come over and I might buy it.”_ Harry never liked using people’s money. He was always the giver not the receiver. But to make Nicole happy Harry will just let him buy one thing. He looks around the store and notices that it sells mostly girl clothes. He could try on the “boyfriend” jeans ironically. At the back of the shop he spots the men's section and his eyes land on a pair of boots. Harry paces to the shoes and cradles it in his hands. The boot is leather and has a huge buckle around the ankle. He searches for Nicole. Once he has, he shouts their name. “Nicole! Look at these!”

Nicole walks to Harry and looks at the boots. They whistle. “Wholly moley, those look tough.” They look to Harry and his face falters. “It's a good thing, Harry. It screams steampunk.”

“I don't know what that is but I'll take it as a complement.” Harry chuckles at himself. He looks at what Nicole has gathered. They are carrying three chokers: one made with flowers, one made with lace, and one that is just a black band. "Hey, I thought you were uncomfortable with masculine or feminine things?" Harry says.

Nicole flushes and looks around to see if anyone heard Harry. They duck their head and whisper "Don't say that out loud." 

Harry furrows his brows. What has Nicole have to hide? "What? Why?" He feels Nicole grab his forearm and suddenly he is dragged to the fitting rooms.

"Not everyone understands, okay? Many people don't even know other genders exists. _You_ didn't before me." Nicole rushes out. Harry is shocked that they could be this angry.

"People can understand. People will understand! Just give them some time. No one should discriminate you just because you are different to what they know." Harry spits out. A wave of anger washes over him.

"Yeah? Well," Nicole starts off strong but then their face falls and voice breaks, "my parents don't seem to accept it. I told them _years_ ago and they still don't accept me. I explained to them. I calmly corrected them. Even when I said that it doesn't feel right, that I feel uncomfortable, when I present male they just just said 'You were born male so you should just suck it up and act like you should'."

Harry looks at Nicole. The joyful, bouncy person he saw a couple minutes before is really someone has been ignored. Their face is heated, tears running down their face. Nicole sits on the bench in the room and drops their head in their hands. Harry goes to sit next to them. He wraps his arms around Nicole as they sob. "That blows, Nicole. I'm sorry your parents don't understand." They continue sobbing as they lay their head on Harry's shoulder. He pushes their curly hair away from their face. "I know how you feel."

Nicole looks to him. "You do?" They sniff and wipe their face. 

Harry nods. He closes his eyes and breathes out. "Not for the same reason, but I still can." He opens his eyes and sees Nicole with wide eyes. They nod so Harry can continue. "My, um, mum's boyfriend is homophobic." Nicole gasps. He chuckles awkwardly. "I-I haven't told anyone but-but," Harry starts to choke on his upcoming tears, "I-I think I'm gay."

The air disappears. The wind is knocked out of him. He actually said it out loud. He finally came out to someone. Weight he didn't realize that was there is lifted. Harry starts crying. He doesn't know if it is from sadness or happiness but he finally came out. _I'm gay._ He repeats.  _I'm not straight._

Nicole holds Harry's hands. "Is this your first time coming out?" Harry nods. Their face softens, they smile. "That's great, Harry! I'm so proud of you." They sniff and wipe their remaining tears. Nicole embraces Harry in a hug. "Remember that your mum's boyfriend is wrong. You aren't gross or broken," they grab Harry's head to make him stare into their eyes, "What you feel is completely real and natural. There isn't anything wrong with you."

Harry smiles at Nicole. He sniffs. "There isn't anything wrong with _us_." He adds. He sees Nicole smile warmly, nodding. Harry grabs the flower choker from the bench and puts it on Nicole. They giggle lightly and look in the mirror. "You look great in that." He whispers into Nicole's ear.

Nicole blushes. They slowly look into Harry's eyes. They roam his face. His face reads anticipating. Nicole stares at Harry's lips for a good moment. They look back at his eyes. Harry's pupils dilate a pinch. They lean over and kiss Harry's temple. "Thank you." They say simply.

~*~

Gemma and Harry are on their way home. Nicole had to leave when they got a phone call that Their friend was waiting for them outside. Harry asked for their number before they left. He couldn't picture himself not talking to them again. Harry remembers how Nicole's backpack would bounce when they walked away. He also remembers how Gemma would smile knowingly.

_"We didn't do anything." Harry pleaded at Gemma's smirk._

_"Sure you didn't." Gemma said unconvincined. "Nothing happened in that dressing room for sure."_

_Harry groans. "Nothing! Happened!" Gemma gave him a 'stop lying' look. "Nothing important."_

_Gemma jumped. "They kissed you! I know it! Nicole kissed you!"_

_Harry bursts out smiling. He couldn't hide it anymore. "They kissed my temple." Gemma squeals. "What does that make me?" He asks._

_Gemma tilts her head. "What do you mean?"_

_"'Cos you know, I thought I was gay but I like Nicole and they aren't a boy so...what does that make me?"_

_Gemma blows a raspberry. "I don't know a lot about this stuff. Search it."_

That's what Harry does the first thing they sneak back into the castle. He pulls out his laptop and googles 'What is it called when you like guys and people with no gender?' He doesn't get an answer but he gets a list of sexualities. Harry's mind is blown from all the different kinds of attractions. He lands on bisexual. _Someone who is attracted to the same gender and other genders._ Harry agrees with that. He has liked guys in the past and he likes Nicole at the moment. Harry then reads pansexual:  _someone who is attracted to all genders / gender doesn't play a role to attraction._ He freezes in his spot. He suddenly doesn't feel alone. "Gemma..." Harry calls.

She comes over and looks at his screen. Gemma reads the definition of pansexual and looks at Harry. "Is that what you are?" She asks.

Harry nods. "I'm pansexual." He says to himself. He looks at Gemma. "I'm pansexual." Harry then texts Nicole and Zayn. 

'Nice! Glad you found an identity, Buddy!' Nicole texts back.

'What's that?' Zayn texts.

Harry texts back 'Google it'. 

"Gemma, Harry! Come downstairs." Anne yells.

Harry looks to Gemma with a panicked look. "I bet it's nothing." She says trying to calm Harry down.

They walk down the stairs and finds Anna and Dennis sitting on the table. Harry internally rolls his eyes. "Yes, Mom?"

Anne pats Dennis' hands before clearing her throat. "I think you're ready to become the next King."

Harry's jaw drops. What? Shouldn't his mom be queen first? He isn't ready for this responsibility. "W-what?" Harry asks confused.

"I knew you'd react like this," Anne chuckles, "but it was your father's wishes. He always wanted to see you become King, since he didn't I still want you to take over the throne."

"Don't you also think your mum deserves a break? After all she's gone through?" Dennis adds like he is relevant in this conversation.

Harry tries to hold back his anger. He never wants to hear Dennis' stupid opinions. He doesn't know what she's gone through. He doesn't know what he is _going_ to put her through. Harry huffs at him and looks to Anne. "If that's what you want, Mum, then I will do as you wish." Harry smiles sweetly at her.

Anne gets off her seat and hugs Harry tightly. "Thank you, my love." 

Harry pulls away from the hug saying, "My pleasure."

Anne then looks to Dennis. "Okay well, then we have to arrange the marriage."

Harry furrows his brows. "Wait, what." He asks flatly.

Dennis gives him a sly smirk. "Oh, you didn't realize? You have to marry a princess in order to be king."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please like and comment if you liked it!


	9. Out of all the princesses

Four kingdoms. There are four kingdoms in the near area with princesses open to marriage. Why would anyone want to be married at Harry's age? So much responsibility that is going to thrown onto their backs. Would anyone even click or connect with him? That's too much pressure on _everyone_. The other princess would probably have to compensate to get along with Harry. Harry would probably have to reserve or change himself to get along with the princess. His and her parents would have to get to know them. What if that doesn't work out? No one has ever heard of a divorce in the royal family. He has never felt more insecure. Which says a lot because he is a teenager and there's enough insecurity to go around. Is Harry weird? Is there something about him that would be a deal breaker?

The first princess' name was Cara. A pretty girl but more importantly, didn't seem to be interested in Harry at all. All the conversations he had with her were one sided. He mainly talked and when he did ask questions about her, she answered in one word. Harry kept his cool but the whole time he wanted to rip his hair out. Mr and Mrs Delevingne were inviting. _"We are planning to go to the beach later, you should join us, Harry!"_ They promised. Harry did the polite thing and agreed but after seeing her kiss another girl when he walked into her room, he doesn't see that happening. He remembers her trying to explain and the other bird standing around not knowing what to do. _"I, um, I.....this doesn't count, right? We haven't even agreed that we are going to be married."_ she said to him. Then the other girl got furious, storming off saying _"Oh! So, I'm just a fling, huh? A last chance of freedom before you get tied down?"_ So there was no chance Harry was marrying Cara.

The second princess, Taylor, was slightly better. She was fit, Harry can't lie, but couldn't go thirty minutes without getting into an argument. _"What do you mean you think a house is a right? Hobos don't deserve a house, they need to get their lazy bums up and get a job!"_ They would argue on smaller things too, like if the roll of toilet paper should face out or in, but people with different political views never get married for a reason. 

Kendall, the third princess, was not Harry's type _at all_. She was stereotypically gorgeous, yes, but _so_ snobby. You can look at one item and it was worth more than a college tuition. Harry got a bad vibe around the house, it felt like everyone was pretending to be nice but a bomb can go off any moment. He didn't feel a second of calm the whole time he was there. Talking to Kendall was the opposite of Cara. She would only talk about herself. Whenever Harry tried to speak he would be interrupted. Ms Kardashian wasn't easier to talk to either. She asked weird questions. She asked if he was thinking of getting a prenup or any children soon. Harry tried his best to answer but she still looked at him like she doesn't trust him. The dinner was delicious, albeit.

Harry learned one thing throughout the whole tidbit, there wasn't anything wrong with any of them. That would be ridiculous to say that it was the girls' fault Harry didn't connect with them. Now, to bring up, there wasn't anything wrong with him either. The matter is just they weren't meant to be married. No one is going to force a marriage, what is this? The 1600's? With that said, a crap ton depends on this last princess. If he doesn't connect with her, this whole plan is fucked. 

Now Harry is on his way to another kingdom. He wipes his sweaty hands on the car seat for the tenth time. His leg is bouncing. He looks at his chauffeur with wide eyes. He tries to breathe evenly but it comes out shaky. 

"Kid, you are going to be _fine_. Just remember that they're people. Regular people. Don't force anything, go with the flow. Relax." The driver says softly. He gives Harry a smile.

Harry nods acting like he is taking the advice. The driver is so wrong. They aren't just people, they are the Tomlinsons. Royalty. He can't go with the flow because he did that the other times and he didn't like any of the girls. He _has_ to force it or else he won't get married and become king. He doesn't seem to have a choice. His mom wants him to take over the throne and he promised he will. 

"We are here." The chauffeur cuts Harry's thoughts.

Harry gulps audibly. He checks his appearance once, then forces himself to leave the car. He waves goodbye to the driver, feeling more nervous by the second. He exhales, turning to the castle. The castle has a more rustic look. 

"Fuck it." Harry says to himself and goes to the door. 

He rings the door bell and waits. The ring echoes through the castle. _Is anyone home?_ Harry asks himself. He looks at the doormat meanwhile. It reads "Go away". Harry chuckles. 

Suddenly he hears the door open and looks up. A shorter boy, brown fringe, and blue eyes stares at him. Harry clears his throat. "Hello, is this the Tomlinsons?" The boy leans on the door frame and smirks at him. He tilts his head. He recognizes the guy from somewhere. 

"Lottie! Styles has arrived!" The guy yells. He looks at Harry and waves him in. "Come inside, have a seat." 

Harry steps in and hangs his coat. He follows the guy and sits across from him. The guy sprawls over the couch and giggles to himself.

"By the way," The guy starts, Harry turning to look at him, "I'm the only Tomlinson."

Harry burrows his eyebrows in question. "What?"

The other guy sits up. "Get it? All I have are sisters, I'm the only son." 

Harry laughs. He nods when the other bloke joins in on laughing. "Now I get it." Harry says between laughs. 

"No, I'm just joking. I _was_ the only son. Mum's expecting a girl and a boy," the guy adds, "I'm Louis." Louis adds.

"Nice to meet you, Louis. I'm Harry." He smiles brightly. If the whole family is like Louis then this is going to be enjoyable. "Oh, and that's great!"

"What is?" Louis asks.

"Your mum, congrats to her!" Harry loves babies for some reason. 

Louis laughs, shaking his head. "I guess it is, I'm buzzing about having a brother for once!" 

Foot steps are heard coming from the hall and five heads pop out. Two little blondes check Harry out. Another blonde looks at him, smiles, then leaves. Then Johanna, Mrs. Tomlinson, smiles and walks over to Harry.

"Hello, Harry, how's your day?" Johanna asks. The two little blondes giggle and she glares at them. "Phoebe, Daisy, go to your room. I'll call you when dinner is ready." They scatter off.

"Oh, it was fine. You?" Harry answers Mrs. Tomlinson. He feels a hand on his shoulder.

"I'm going to get ready for dinner," Louis looks at his mum and Harry, "nice meeting you, Harry."

Harry studies Louis. He knows he saw him before. Where was it? It wasn't on tv or news.

"Lottie will be down in a bit." Johanna cuts Harry's thought. She looks cozy but wanting to sit very soon. Harry looks at her enlarged stomach.

"May I?" Harry asks pointing at her stomach. Mrs. Tomlinson nods, moving her hands away from her belly. He puts his hands on her stomach. Harry feels slight movements and he smiles widely. "What are you going to name them?"

"Ernest and Doris." Johanna says looking at her middle. 

Harry can tell her excitement and love towards her upcoming babies. He feels warm inside. He hopes he would have what she has later in life. Harry looks up and sees Lottie. "Hello, Charlotte." Harry greets, taking his hands off Mrs. Tomlinson's belly.

"Call me Lottie. Nice to see you, Harry." Lottie walks over to her mum. "Should we have dinner now?" She asks Johanna. 

Mrs. Tomlinson nods. "Call your brother and sister then." She tells Lottie. Lottie runs off shouting their names. Johanna looks to Harry. "Come help set up." She asks. Harry follows.

~*~

The Ham is in the center of the table, with the sides surrounding it. Glasses and plates are put down. Harry is sat by Lottie on his right. The twins are on his left. Mrs. And Mr. Tomlinson is sat across but Louis is still missing. 

Harry clears his throat, "Should I go find him?" He suggests.

Johanna rolls her eyes. "Please. He never goes to dinner anymore." 

Harry gets up and roams the castle. He looks in all rooms. The living space is empty. Harry doesn't dare to check the bedrooms, that would be invasion of privacy. He goes to another room. Harry gasps. They have a _theatre_ in their house. He restrains himself from watching a movie and moves on.

"Louis?" He whispers. He reaches the bathroom and behold is Louis sitting on the toilet. Harry knocks the door frame to catch his attention. "You're holding up dinner."

Louis glares at him. _"Oops! I thought this restroom was empty."_ Louis mocks. 

Harry furrowed his eyebrows. "What?"

Louis steps up to Harry. Harry holds his breath. They are an inch apart. _"Hi. Um, I see you have my phone."_ Louis continues mocking.

"What are you talking about?" Harry spews out. He isn't catching onto what is going on and Louis is wasting time.

_"Boy, aren't you a sight for sore eyes."_ Louis mocks again.

Suddenly it clicks in Harry's brain. 

The club. The time he went with Zayn and Liam. Louis is the guy he bumped into and flirted with randomly. He runs his hands through his hair. "Oh no," Harry cringes, "This is awkward."

"No shit," Louis scoffs, "how do you think it feels that the guy who flirted with me is considering marrying my sister?"

Harry exhales. He knew he remembered Louis from somewhere. How can he explain himself? Harry sits on the floor and picks at his jeans. "I'm not _gay_ gay." Louis is taken aback. He waves his head and hands in protest. "I mean, I'm not _straight_." He adds quickly.

Louis puts props his head on his hand. "Then what are you?" He asks curiously, giving up his guard. He stands up straight and blurts out, "Only if you want to."

Harry flushes and scratches his head. He only have came out to Gemma in person. "Um, have you ever heard of pansexual?" He holds his breathe and waits for the snarky comments. _So you like pans? Is that one of those made up sexualities?_

Louis nods. "Yeah, I heard of it. You like every gender?" 

Harry is the one taken aback now. He didn't expect Louis to know that, let alone be so accepting. "Y-yeah. So, I'm not, I dunno, lying to your sister?" Harry explains himself but mid way realizes he doesn't need to.

"I was just checking if your parents were forcing you to marry a girl. Some people are still homophobic and think that somehow if you date girls, the gay will 'disappear'." Louis huffs out, rolling his eyes. 

That makes sense to Harry. If he had a sister, he wouldn't want her to marry someone who wouldn't want to.

A moment of silence passes. They look to each other and dart their eyes away. "Hey, sorry if I made you uncomfortable, when I flirted with you."

Louis smiles to himself. "You didn't." 

Harry is relieved. But Louis' answer brings up another question. Did Louis enjoy it when Harry flirted with him? Should he ask him? He decides against it. He tries to continue the conversation. "So you know a lot about sexuality?" 

Louis opens his mouth, then shuts. "Doesn't matter." Louis brushes off quickly. He suddenly stands up and leaves the restroom. Harry whips his head around, confused. Harry stands up. "You better treat her right then, Styles." Louis says from across the hall. He follows Louis to the dinner table.

Johanna rolls her eyes. " _Finally_ you're here." She turns and smiles at Harry. "Thank you for bringing him here."

Louis scoffs and hastily sits down. Harry wants to ask what's bothering him. He settles on asking for the ham.

~*~

The dinner was uneventful. Mostly small talk about childhood and education. Although he was comfortable with the Tomlinsons, which was the goal, Harry is thinking about Louis. Why was Louis uncomfortable talking about sexuality? Did Louis enjoy Harry flirting with him?

The real question was, why was Harry more interested in Louis than Lottie? 

Harry arrives his house and goes straight to his room. As he goes up the he sees Anne's concerned face in his peripheral vision. He kicks his door open and flops onto the bed. Gemma, who was on the window sill browsing the Internet, looks at Harry. 

"Were they a dud too?" Gemma walks over to poke Harry's shoulder.

Harry shakes his head.

"What's the matter then?" Gemma sits on the bed.

Harry lays on his back. "I might have a small problem." He looks at Gemma's confused face. "I'm looking more forward to talking to the brother than the princess." 

She blows a raspberry. "Damn, really?" Gemma picks at the bed sheet. "What happened, exactly?"

Harry scrubs his face. "Dunno, honestly." He stares at the ceiling. "I came to meet the family and they were nice."

"That nice but what made you like the brother than the princess?" Gemma presses.

"I talked to the brother and I sorta came out to him." Harry adds. He sees Gemma's shocked face. "And met him before."

Gemma sits up, shock and amusement in her face. "Where?" 

Harry feels his face warm up in embarrassment. "At a club. I might of flirted with him too."

Gemma bursts out laughing. She flails her body onto the bed and grasps her stomach. "That's priceless." She says in between laughs. "What a coincidence."

Harry lightly slaps her in the arm. "Shut up." He laughs.

"What club was it?" Gemma asks

Harry shrugs. "My friends brought me there, I'll text them." 

Harry pulls out his phone and quickly texts _Hey, weird question, what club did you bring me to? That one time?_

A minute passes and Zayn responds. Gemma looks at Harry's phone. _Liam said it was called fruit salad_ Harry looks at Gemma, and she is the verge of laughing. 

Harry tilts his head in confusion. "What's funny?"

"You don't get it?" Gemma says, still stifling her laughter. Harry shakes his head. She bursts out laughing. She laughs for a good 5 minutes.

Harry rolls his eyes. He really would prefer Gemma to explain than to laugh at his lack of knowledge. He grabs her arm and shakes her. "Gemma, c'mon, what does fruit salad mean?" 

Gemma finally stops laughing, wiping away a tear. "Fruit salad is slang for gay sex." She chuckles. 

Harry gasps. "Wait, does that mean?-"

Gemma begins to laugh again, "You went to a gay bar, Haz. The prince you flirted with was at a gay bar."

**Author's Note:**

> If you like the story, comment and suscribe


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